In Reference to Chocolate Easter Bunnies

The Bunny, the Bunny... Whoa, I ate the Bunny.
I didn't eat my soup or my bread, just the Bunny.
The Bunny, the Bunny... Oh! I love the Bunny.
But now I feel sick in the head from the Bunny.

I didn't eat my salad; I didn't eat my steak.
I had too much candy, got a tummy ache!

I need to eat good food to help me to grow.
I'll obey my momma, 'cause she loves me so.
Yeah, I'll go to church. And I'll go to school.
That stuff is important and I ain't no fool!

I don't want no pickles, I don't want no honey,
I just want a plate and a fork and a Bunny.
I don’t want a tissue when my nose is runny,
I just want a plate and a fork and a Bunny.
I don’t want to tell you a joke that is funny,
I just want a plate and a fork and a Bunny.
I don’t want to play on a day that is sunny,
I just want a plate and a fork and a Bunny.

"Veggie Tales" so rules.
Lisa | 9:30 PM

 
I reeeeeally want to get my hair cut. I picked out a style, and my hair has been dyed a purplish reddish thingamacolor. So will someone please lend me $15 and an hour of free time? And someone tell 'Monique' to get her ass back in town from Colorado. I'm dying here.
Lisa | 8:43 PM

 
I changed up the site a little bit. I played with "Eye Candy," making each pic a link to a relevant or just plain cool website for all you boredom-smothered duds out there. I know of two people who will visit each and every site. Everyone else will just blow it off because, well, that's what you guys seem to do. Admittedly, and pathetic as it is, I put more effort into making this site fun for you guys than for myself. But yeah... Updates are around.
Lisa | 6:54 PM

 
Last night I discovered that I am not having an allergic reaction at all. Instead, I have a million plus two chigger bites. It's my fault really since I laid down in Jacq's backyard one night. Smart move dumbass.

People keep asking me if I feel any older now that I've turned 18. At first I didn't, but after last night I guess I do a tiny bit. I went to see my friend Tim, but I didn't leave my house until sometime after midnight. I felt older for doing my own thing, even in the late hours of the night. I felt like a kid when I lied to my dad about where I was. I didn't do anything illegal or immoral, yet I still lied. I'm such a fuck.

I watched "Top Secret," which is probably the dumbest movie I have ever seen, but it was still pretty funny. I'm sure it's a film Val Kilmer would like to erase from his record.
I learned how to make fractals....sort of. They are pretty trippy, but as long as you have a good color scheme, just about every design is aesthetically pleasing.
I also compared sketches with Tim. He is a much better artist than I am, but I still think I am pretty good. I was thinking about creating an album for my artwork, but until our scanner starts working again, there will be no images for quite some time.
Lisa | 12:04 PM

 
Typical Day With A Twist

Went to Mina's today. Things are looking up as far as this new job goes. Hope it stays that way. I worked at Baker's pretty much all day, and though I don't completely hate it, a change would be nice. And anything to stay away from those awful new uniforms. Blech.
Created a new character today. Actually, I took an old doodle and drew a bunch of different facial expressions and sidekick characters. It could be a pretty kickass comic if I decide to continue putting effort into it.
Started painting on canvas today. It was a first for me. I copied the style of Drew, but at least I'm giving him props. I'd show you guys a picture, but my scanner is down.
Does anyone know if my dad still reads this blog? I'd like to know if I still have to watch what I say on here. I've got plenty to talk about, but some of it just can't be mentioned in the presence of authority figures.

Um, yeah....
Lisa | 10:29 PM

 
Of all the days to be "sulky" why did it have to be today? I'm supposed to be enjoying my birthday, yet here I am sitting in my room with nothing to do but surf the internet. Doesn't anyone care that today is supposed to be my special day? Where the fuck is MY surprise party? Or what about all those times you say, "Oh yeah, we should definitely hang out sometime!" Well here's you're big fucking chance and you're blowing it. It's not like I'm asking you to spend all your money on me. I just don't deserve to be sitting around by myself. It's a milestone in my life and no one gives a damn. Well you know what? You all can just go fuck yourselves, and the next time you need something from me, don't bother asking. I'm sick of being there for everyone and never getting anything in return.

I feel like shit.
Lisa | 8:59 PM

 
The Big One Eight

Today is my birthday and I am not terribly excited. The first person to say Happy Birthday to me was Brian N. because we were at the movies around midnight. He is back in town for only a short while and I wanted to spend some time with him before he left again. I have always had a small crush on him, but I've never let it get in the way of our friendship. He's a great guy and I'm lucky to have him as a friend. We spiked his hair black for camouflage's sake because after seeing "Bad Boys II" we went TPing. I am so good at TPing. Juvenile as it was, I had a lot of fun. Despite the artist in me, I had forgotten how much I love action movies. I don't really know what else to say. I'm 18. I did not buy cigarettes at the store. I did not make a visit to Dr. John's Adult Emporium. I did not register to vote. I woke up late and watched HBO for an hour. The house was empty and I did not even get so much as a post-it note on the fridge saying "Happy Birthday." I'm feeling very blasé about the whole matter really. Seth had better call me tonight though, because he is one person I do expect to wish me a 'Happy Birthday' and hopefully an 'I love you,' too.
Lisa | 11:38 AM

 
I am a listmaker. I make lists for anything and everything. I stick these lists in huge piles of papers and files and folders in hopes of separating and going through important paperwork. However, the lists hide in the piles for months and months only to be rediscovered six months later and subsequently stuck into another disorganized pile to be sorted through later.

Reasons Why I Am Broke This Week:
- Woe is I by Patricia T. O'Conner
- Writers on Writing: Collected Essays from The New York Times
- A Girl, In Parts by Jasmine Paul
- Erotica Universalis, Volume II by Gilles Néret
- The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer
- Ice Hair Spiker Colorz in "Tar Black" and "Trip'd Out Pink"
- An 8"x10" artist canvas
- Two 8"x10" artist canvas panels
- Two Blick Academic synthetic paint brushes
- A set of 10 pressed charcoal sticks
- The unabridged edition of Gray's Anatomy to aid in life drawing
Lisa | 7:06 PM

 
What my world needs now, besides love, sweet love

Today is my Aunt Deanna's birthday. Tomorrow is my birthday. Normally I don't have wish lists because I buy everything for myself. But just in case some of you out there desperately want to get me something, here's a list of stuff I could think of off the top of my head. Maybe it'll serve as my future shopping list. I put down prices 'n' stuff, but I really don't expect anything except a smile or an e-mail. Yeah so...whatever.

Lisa's Birthday Wish List
-- A haircut by Monique, $11 at Capitol
-- A drawing board, $25 at Dick Blick
-- Light up shoes for adults, size 9, $20 at Walmart
-- A digital camera or webcam, prices vary
-- A computer desk, $60 at Target
-- The matching file cabinet, also at Target
-- Picture frames, $3-20 at Hobby Lobby
-- Clear thumbtacks, $2 wherever
-- "Circle of Friends” correspondance book, $10 at Borders
-- Sprial CD tower, $10 at Target
-- Various CD’s of course
-- Black and white postcards, $1.25 somewhere downtown
-- A tank of gas, $20 at Kum-&-Go
-- A cup of coffee, $3 at Starbucks
-- Funny cards with heartfelt messages, $.99 at Walgreens
-- NO smelly stuff, it will be given away
Lisa | 3:06 PM

 
Naked. Wet. Covered in suds.

That's a phrase I stole from Jess because it creates imagery, and in Creative Writing I learned that imagery is a good thing.
Today during my shower a big, black spider fell down from the ceiling right in front of me and landed on the porcelain floor. The proximity of the creepy creature to my naked, slippery body was not at all pleasant. After futile attempts to drown the sucker I finally squished it with a washcloth.
When I was a kid my dad told me that it is not right to kill bugs when they are outside because that is their home, and they're really not hurting anything. But when they invade your home, it is every man or bug or man-bug hybrid (See "The Fly" starring Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis) for himself.
I do not need any more itchy bug bites right now. I am covered in red spots and I cannot stop scratching them and I feel like dying, but not really because I am not yet ready to die. The thought of death before one has lived a considerably full life saddens me.
Lisa | 12:23 PM

 
I fucking hate chocolate. I hate candy bars with chocolate. I hate chocolate ice cream. I hate chocolate syrup and chocolate sprinkles and chocolate pudding. I only like chocolate milk. And even then, I'm very picky about the brand. I can't stand the thought of all that concentrated sugar settling down onto my teeth, causing massive cavities and unbelievable pain. I don't know how to end this paragraph, but I really just felt like shouting that I HATE CHOCOLATE!!!

Except I can't shout because everyone is asleep and I am just that nice.
Lisa | 1:04 AM

 
Due to some freak allergic reaction, I have now covered the majority of my body in Benadryl Gel. I have what looks like a million bug bites, and they all itch like crazy. Let us hope I don't scratch myself to embarassment at work.
Lisa | 7:10 PM

 
Amen to That!

"And now, a word to the wired: E-mail is no excuse for lousy English.
Granted, virtual writing is usually more informal than writing in the "real" world. But informal doesn't mean incoherent -- or it shouldn't. Unfortunately, much of the writing you see in cyberspace (and e-mail isn't the only culprit) barely qualifies as English. The words are chosen with little or no thought. The grammar is a mess. The punctuation is either absent or in your face. As for spelling, it's hit-or-miss -- usually miss. No wonder the whole point of an e-mail is often lost in transmission.
Don't bother rounding up the usual suspects. Even people who are normally careful about their English may throw the rules out the window when they go online. Maybe they don't think of e-mail as writing. Maybe they don't realize that good English is just as important online as off.
In fact, misunderstandings are more likely in an e-mail than in a letter or a phone call or a face-to-face conversation. The speed, the brevity, the disengagement of online writing all conspire to muddle your message. And the short attention span of the wired reader only makes things worse.
What's more, the virtual world is full of strangers, people who know you only by your words. Sure your best friend will overlook a few misspellings or lapses in grammar. But people you've never met will judge you solely by what they see on their computer screens. To them, you are what you write.
In short, online writing needs all the help it can get. Good English is clear English. It's efficient, precise, sensible, economical, sometimes even beautiful. And that's just as true in e-mail as it is in snail mail -- or any other kind of writing.
E-mail that's hard to understand -- ambiguous, poorly worded, misspelled, unpunctuated -- takes only an instant to send but forever to decipher. So e-mail unto others as you would have them e-mail unto you.
That means you don't call time-out when you log on. Such niceties as grammar spelling, and punctuation do matter online, plus a few more besides. Here are some things for the wired writer to consider before clicking Send...."

~ Patricia T. O'Conner, Woe Is I
Lisa | 6:01 PM

 
Am I Worthy?

I am a thief. No a copycat. No a borrower. I don't know! If I see a good idea that works, why not use it for myself? It's not like I claim credit for the original thought, right? Yeah so fuck it. Anyway, according to HumanForSale.com, I am worth exactly $1,684,860.00. Looking at some of the most expensive people listed, and comparing them to some of the greatest geniuses of our time, I think somebody lied about their IQ. The point is to be honest with yourself. I'm far from perfect, and I'm not afraid to admit my faults. I'm a screwup. I'm a showoff. I'm overweight. I'm impatient. I'm lethargic. I waste my money. I procrastinate. I am selfish. I don't give a damn. But you know what? I'm also attractive, funny, smart, creative, generous, outgoing, brave, compassionate and talented. I'm annoying, but you can't help falling in love with me. So fuck it, right?
Lisa | 1:34 PM

 
2:35 AM and my house still smells like burned shit. Nastay.
"The Breakfast Club" rocked! You guys have got to go to these shows. It's not your normal movie-going experience. People shout at the screen and stuff, but you LIKE it. I saw a bunch of Mercy girls there. During the lipstick scene I shouted down front to Maggie R. because...
Sophomore year we were in choir together, and we were getting ready for a performance. Maggie always wears lots of icky gooey lipstick, lipgloss, lip junk, whatever. She put some on, but we were about to go on. She had no pockets in her dress so she just stuck the lipstick down into her cleavage thinking it would be safe there until after we finished singing and dancing. Well it turned out we still had another five or ten minutes to go, so we started talking again. I looked down and realized Maggie's lipstick was sticking right out of her cleavage for all to see. "Uh Maggie...You might wanna ditch that before we go on." She laughed at the memory when I yelled at her from the back of the theater.
I went to the movie with my cousin Kate who is only four days younger than me (so Happy Birthday Kate!). I'm really glad I got to see her because we really haven't seen each other since Christmas or Easter or some sort of holiday, and I might not be able to make it to her birthday dinner. :( She's definitely someone you should know because there's just too many good qualities to her and you can only hope that some of them might rub off on you.
I was talking to my in-town stalker, Dave Bagby, tonight. I told him to quit being such a dork. I see him everywhere I go. "I'm not a stalker, I swear!" Yeah, right. Who do I see not one hour later at the same movie as me?? Dave Gag-me. You know, I really wouldn't mind being his friend or anything, but sometimes the stuff he says just really annoys the hell out of me. I dunno. I guess it is somewhat flattering to have a stalker....even if he's in denial.

P.S. The schedule for my weekly movie ventures is now posted in the sidebar. Feel free to join me anytime! :)
Lisa | 2:37 AM

 
Holy Mother of....!!!
(aka "Crisis in the Kitchen")

Lisa almost burned down her new house tonight....
You all know what a huge fan of Easy Mac I am, despite how gross it actually can be. I came home from work, starving. However, we were out of Easy Mac, so I had to go with the normal kind - stovetop. You also know that I am a Trading Spaces junkie. So while immersed in an episode with some of my favorite designers, I totally forgot about the macaroni cooking on the stove! Doh!! I didn't realize it until I smelled smoke creeping into the living room from the kitchen. "Holy Mother of.... I'm such an idiot!" I turned on all the fans I could find and opened all the windows and doors. Surprisingly enough, no smoke alarms went off. Yuck... I can still smell burned noodle, and I'm all the way upstairs. Actually, it was more than burned noodle. It should have been called "Macaroni and Cheese Charcoal." I took pictures to show you just how gross it was. I tried scrubbing the pan and bleaching it and using the most elbow grease you've ever seen. Luckily I'm still alive, the cat is still alive, and my dad didn't get angry when he came home.

Fact: I have the strongest right arm in the entire world, which can be ideal in times of crisis.
Lisa | 9:02 PM

 
Last night was Tyffaney's surprise birthday party. We held it a week later than her birthday because all her friends were in the Dominican Republic last week. It was a lot of fun. I got to watch back-to-back episodes of "While You Were Out" - the Trading Spaces spinoff. And the present that I made her was the coolest. I painted a bulletin board (cause I'm really artsy) and covered it in tons of pictures of her and her friends. I'm telling you, it was the coolest! I got to see Bryan again, which was really nice. I wish I would have spent more time with him this summer now that we don't really hate each other and all. I went and hung out with Jacqueline which was really nice because she's like my biggest blog fan and I haven't really seen her since we graduated. We'll definitely be hanging out again because Jacq, you rock!
Because I walk around in flip-flops and I spent five years of my life walking barefoot on the cement pool deck for swim team, my feet are less than perfect. Basically they're just like, rough n' stuff. Which is normal, I guess. I put on some foot cream to make them and soft and silky and nice (whatever) and now my feet totally feel tingly. It's the coolest.

Fact: The skin on your feet is up to 50 times thicker than the skin on the rest of your body.
Lisa | 10:53 AM

 
Have no fear, Lisa is here!

She saves the day once again with her new comment feature. What an outstanding character! Show her the love by voicing your opinions much more often than you already do. She saw blogs get 40 comments on one entry! We can't let her down, can we? (Insert sound of crowd shouting "No!" here) That's right, men. Get the guts to say something.

Howfuckingcheesywasthat?
Leave your comments already.
Yeezus.
Lisa | 4:13 PM

 
Woot! Guess who just got offered a job? If you didn't guess me, you're an idiot. As you all know I clean my dentist's office once a week. I was thinking about quitting Baker's when school starts, and Mina (dentist/boss) offered me a part-time job as her dental assistant. We'd be able to work around my class schedule, I'd probably get paid more, and I'd enjoy the job. It would include stuff like filing, sterilizing instruments, mixing materials, etc. It'd be a job I'd brag about :) Yeah so, let's hope my schedules don't conflict and I can get this job.
Baker's is already pissing me off - they scheduled me on my birthday, they scheduled me on Friday (which is the one day a week I told them I could not work), they scheduled me on Saturday, meaning I can't go to my cousin's birthday dinner. Blah. Maybe I can get Jackie to switch with me. I switched with her, after all. She owes me. I'll only miss my co-worker's. The rest of Baker's sucks.
Lisa | 12:29 PM

 
If the Klink Family doesn't get their act together, I'm going to have to switch over to HaloScan which will totally mess up my archives and any possible sequel to Phresh Phish (should that ever get edited and published). Things you can do to make me feel better: 1) IM me with comments - maybe I'll post them, 2) link me in your profile, on your website, whatnot - it looks like I could use some more publicity, 3) Get your vote on!

P.S. Little Debbie Grosses Me Out......A Lot
Lisa | 8:44 AM

 
last night.....lisa dreamed.....that she.....was dating.....a clown.
she also found.....her only pair.....of plain.....white.....underwear.
what.....a fucking.....weirdo.
Lisa | 10:57 AM

 
Yes, I realize the comment feature is down, but there's really nothing I can do about it. Be patient and I'm sure it will be up and running soon. Meanwhile, get your vote on!

P.S. Could somebody tape Trading Spaces for me? I have to work today.
(Just kidding. I'm not that obsessive.)
Lisa | 12:18 PM

 
Election 2003 - Cast Your Vote!

Okay folks, it's time for a contest. Bryan and I, out of our insomnia-prompted boredom, went hard to work at designing a new title image for the site. There will be a contest to see who likes which one better. I suppose this will also let me know just how many people actually visit this site. The poll will be up for say...two weeks? Or until I get bored with it. Anyway, here are the two images. The poll is in the sidebar. Start voting!!




Lisa | 9:43 AM

 
Have you ever heard the song "Meet Virginia" by Train? I wish someone would write a song like that about me.
Lisa | 5:09 PM

 
I'm seven days away from being 18 and I'm not excited about it at all. My movie rental is almost a week late and I'm not in the mood to return it. The store called me with their automated guilt trip reminding me just how late my movie was and I told it to go fuck itself. I woke up late again, sat around waiting for Trading Spaces to come on, and made myself sick from too many Cheezits and Shirley Temples. We're out of Easy Mac, so I had to skip breakfast. I wonder how fast I'd be dead if I were living on my own because my diet really sucks and the only exercise I get is walking downstairs to the tv or upstairs to my computer. But I really don't give a shit about any of it right now. I'm getting too much sleep and I love it. I sang my heart out in the shower knowing that I'll never be a rock star or anything of the sort. I'm wearing both jeans and a dress today. If the girl at Java Joe's could pull it off, well fuck! So can I! The tag on my thong is making my ass itch, and my tongue is stained red with grenadine. I agreed to switch schedules with a girl at work because I could use the money, but for what I'm not sure yet. I'm staring at a puzzle piece I stole from Nick. Now he'll never be able to finish his Simpsons Mosaic. Muah ha ha ha. My Bobble-Head Jack is the coolest thing that ever kicked your ass, and just when I start to wonder what I ever saw in him, I fall in love with Seth all over again. He's never terribly romantic and scoffs at anything mushy. We have nothing in common. We just know how to put up with each other. He's an ass sometimes, but I wouldn't want him any other way. I think I will become a professional karaoke singer when I grow up. According to the majority, I grow up in seven days. I'm so not ready...
Lisa | 5:04 PM

 
"Ah, the bittersweet nectar of the world's hatred..." she moaned as she sipped her grenadine.
I do believe I'm going to be ill.

i do not like it when people do not answer my questions i like it when people tell me the truth even if i lie to them in return i like it when people fall in love with me and i play them like a fiddle and i flirt with them when i want to and they give all their attention to me and i wonder if it is because i am a leo or if it is because i am purely evil so even if my heart belongs to someone else and i am completely and utterly in love with him to the point of obsession it is still nice to have someone around to play with because i get lonely here without him and it's not like i am doing anything terribly wrong because i exercise enough self control to remain faithful but sometimes it is nice to feel affection from another when you so rarely see it and i wish i could tell the world the truth but i could never do that at least not for quite some time because then everything would be ruined and i would not get what i want which is desperately to be happy and there is only one way i can see that happening so please help me be strong and upbeat and patient and let life work out in the end because thats all we really want from the world
Lisa | 11:11 PM

 
I am Inspired. I Like to Write.

I am Naughty. I like The Cosby Show. I like Cheez-Its dipped in Chocolate.
I am Lazy. I do not like Hot Weather. I do not like High Heels.
I am Silly. I like to Read. I like to Sing.
I am Adorable. I do not like to Lose Raffles. I do not like Lip Gloss.
I am Intelligent. I like Lots of Mirrors. I like to Drive Fast.
Lisa | 9:20 PM

 
In the Style of Raymi...
Plus a Little Bit of Me

Today I ate Easy Mac for breakfast at I don't know what time but it was sometime in the afternoon because it was not long after that Trading Spaces came on. I cleaned out my car. There is always a lot of stuff in my car. Loads of trash and other funky memorabilia. Then I tried cleaning my room. It was a deep clean like the kind that facial cleansers give to your pores except my room does not have any pores just a window and a door. I emptied three moving boxes and filled one tub and half of a large trash can. The tub is full of things that I no longer want, and I am willing to give them away. The Slaydens have first dibs as promised. What is not taken will probably be dropped off at Goodwill because they sell a lot of cool stuff. Actually there is a photo album in the tub that I bought from Goodwill for approximately 59 cents. I think it would be funny to see it end up there again like the Cirlce of Life except there is no real life because a photo album is an inanimate object that Raymi might refer to as "meow meow." I don't really know Raymi or Anti but I know they are dating and they both keep blogs and I stumbled onto these blogs when I was surfing the internet at two in the morning because I have insomnia. My dad came home while I was cleaning my room but he did not bug me or anything which was nice because I had and still have a lot of work to do. I think I will be able to get it done this week because I don't have to work again until Thursday which sucks because my money runs out faster than my air supply. Gee, I hope that doesn't run out anytime soon. I took a break from cleaning and went downstairs and washed my hands because I was all dusty and smelly. Well actually I didn't smell that bad because I sprayed some perfume that I wore a long time ago and it reminded me of my life way back when and reminiscing is very pleasant for me. I made a salad for dinner and it had black olives and croutons and caesar dressing. I really like black olives. I like to put them on my fingertips and suck them off one at a time except I didn't do that this time because I bought pre-sliced olives because I don't like whole olives in my salads. I don't like pre-made salads like the kinds at restaurants because I am very meticulous and I have to break up each piece of lettuce until it is bite size so I don't get dressing all over my face when I go to take a bite with a fork. After dinner I made myself two Shirley Temples in a stolen martini glass which is ironic because I wasn't making martinis and as far as you know I didn't put any alcohol in my Shirley Temples. I got a letter from the AP people telling me what I already knew about my AP tests that I took in May but did not care to take. I munched on some cheez-its and told my dad he should be a gigolo because he could probably make good money even if it was from a pruny old grandma or a lady with no teeth and a mullet but he said no thanks. My brother did not join in this conversation because he is out of town for the week at a boy scout camp and thank goodness the month-long heat wave is dying down because they make the boys do manual labor out there and it would suck if someone passed out from heatstroke. My arm has been hurting all day because I slept funny and now I am sore and I really hate it when that happens. I'm not quite sure what I want to do with the rest of my day but I know I don't want to go out in public because I have acne and I am too lazy to put any makeup on or even drive my car. Maybe I will just dye my hair or something, who knows? I suppose if someone tried really hard they could persuade me to leave the house. As I was telling Tony, I would really like to just float around in the air for a bit like on a cloud but without going outside and he thought I wanted to get high but I said no I have never been high thank you very much. I just want to float.
Lisa | 8:02 PM

 
In the Words of Anti...

First watch this.

Then look at this.

Stubbornism is a tough life to lead.
Lisa | 7:35 PM

 
For All You Peaceniks Out There



Yeah, we went to war. It sucked. People died. Our country got what it wanted, but it paid a heavy price. Do we really need to keep it going? I think not. The Bush Administration is meeting here in Omaha in a couple weeks to plan the proliferation of new weapons of mass destruction. What?! I think we're powerful enough as is. Do we really need to create more weapons, which will only lead to someone's death? Quite frankly, I think it's a bit scary to think about. We engaged in war in order to curtail the building of WMD in other countries. Now we want to go hypocritical on their asses and build more of our own? That's pure crap. Maybe I'm all fired up about the government because I just watched "The Majestic." Or maybe I really do feel strongly about this. I don't know yet. But here's my chance to find out: http://www.sos2003.com. Maybe I'll see you there.
Lisa | 2:33 PM

 

You are a Pig! You are fun to be with and you absoutely LOVE food. And you enjoy life! :)

What Farm Animal Are You?

Yay for self-confidence (or, thanks to this quiz, lack thereof)!
Lisa | 2:04 AM

 
Well folks, now it looks like my dad is going to take my car away. I must be doing something wrong here. If I don't have a car, I can't keep my jobs. Tyffaney was supposed to ask her uncle about selling me a car for a pretty reasonable price, but I don't think she's really looked into it. I know he's going to help her friend Andrew, but that's about it. I wouldn't mind paying for a new car. I have a fair amount of money to use as a down payment, and if I had to make car payments every month, it would definitely regulate my personal spending, which is just what I need. I think I should also set aside some money each month for tuition to help out my dad. If I want to accomplish all this, I'm going to have to save face and ask for money when I need it. Normally, if I need anything from new socks to tampons to school supplies to lunch and dinner, I usually pay for it myself. I guess it wouldn't hurt to spend my earned money on more important necessities like school and a car. This is the part of becoming a grown up I'm really starting to dread.
Lisa | 9:21 PM

 
Dear Abby, Part 2

Does anyone know of a decent general practitioner around here? I hate to admit the fact that I'm nine days away from being 18, and I still go to a pediatrician. Waiting for half an hour or more in a waiting room full of crying babies and shouting toddlers causes a bigger headache than the one I had coming in. And due to my family's cancer-filled health history, I really need to get a mammogram. Pediatricians certainly don't offer this at their offices. Almost none of their patients even have boobs! I'm not looking forward to some stranger squeezing my breasts with a huge clamp, but it needs to be done. Does anyone know where I can go?
Lisa | 9:50 AM

 
Where can I make a decent amount of money without working 60 hours a week? I need to get a new job. Baker's isn't giving me nearly enough hours, even if it's as a crappy cashier (which I did NOT apply for). Creighton is the most expensive university in the state. I already pay for everything myself, excluding house/utilities bills, a few groceries, and toilet paper. Now that we only have one income that is considerably less than it was before the dipshits at my dad's old work let the business fall through, I also have to try and help pay for college. All my uber-rich friends have parents who are doctors or own their own restaurants. No wonder life seems easier for them.
Lisa | 9:45 AM

 
June archives are up for your loading convenience.
Lisa | 3:51 PM

 
I am Seventeen, Going on Eighteen

I wonder if it's the joy of meeting a new person, or the development of a small crush that makes me like talking to the one-hour photo guy from Wal*Mart. He's 28 years old and looks a bit like an Arian Jesus. He's a complete computer nerd and has a daughter that is half my age. It's probably not appropriate for me to be developing a relationship with him, even if it's as harmless as a friendship. But it's really nice to have someone around to talk to that is on a somewhat higher level of intelligence than the rest of my friends. It's nice to converse with someone whose hobbies to not include hanging out with their buddies at the local mall. Not that the mall isn't fun, but I've always found pleasure in making friends with people older than me. They seem to understand me a little better than most. I'm one of those girls who's always wishing she was older than she was, always crushing on "older men," and always trying to act more mature than everyone else (except in the privacy of my local mall). I'm so hopeless sometimes.
Lisa | 10:50 PM

 
Our Little Girl is All Grown Up

I attended the Summer Preview program at Creighton these last two days. It was a very enjoyable experience, and I would recommend all you underclassmen to look into similar sorts of programs being offered at your prospective colleges and universities. Not only did I meet tons of new people and make some cool friends, but I also learned a lot of information that I could not have acquired on the school website or in their monthly newsletter. I wasn't really looking forward to going to college until now. Today I found out I gained AP Calculus credit, allowing me to drop my Applied Mathematics course, skip Intro to Mass Communication (with a lovely little waiver from my advisor), and go straight into News Reporting. I must say that has definitely lifted my spirits and erased my worries about attending school this fall. I didn't get any credit on my other AP tests of course, because I spent most of that time doodling in the back of the books and coming up with limericks about where they could put their brain-crushing AP tests. I kinda wish I was living on campus with all my friends, but I think I can still make the most of it and get involved. Most of my classes are in the afternoon or evening, and I think this may be a good thing. If I do my homework in the mornings, I don't have to worry about falling asleep with my face in my book and learning through osmosis. And this semester I will do my homework. Promise. Back to Summer Preview... It allowed me to spend some time with some of my old friends that I hadn't seen in a while (namely, Candice). My first serious boyfriend was there as well. In years past, we never liked him much. Neither did our friends. Especially Candice. But every time I turned around, there he was, discussing with her the many different ways one can hurt people with a single judo chop. They both share a love of martial arts. And as I learned, there is no such thing as a judo chop in marital arts. He turned out to be a nice guy for the most part. But after an hour of talking to him, you realize he's still a total jackball sometimes. I wouldn't mind becoming his friend (he's one of three ex-boyfriends I never see or talk to), but I can't see myself hanging out with him on the weekends. Actually, my brother just told me that another ex of mine, David, will also be attending Creighton. Golly gee, I'm so lucky! I'm not worried though. There's over 900 students in my freshman class, and should I ever run into these boys, I've learned to compose myself with maturity. So those of you who live vicariously through my blog and me, get yourselves excited because we're grown up and goin' to college. Woot!
Lisa | 10:09 PM

 
Why does the world find it so unusual when a girl admits to indulging in a little self-gratification once in a while? Sex (of most kinds) is a beautiful and natural thing, and girls have just as much right to it as guys do. I admit to being perfectly normal, and everyone around me freaks out like I've just shouted something horrifically blasphemous throughout the Vatican. I think the real issue at hand is the fact that people get far too embarassed to talk about things that in the past were deemed socially unacceptable and down right nasty. I could not help but feel a littel uneasy when a friend of mine (I won't name names) was in the bathroom stall next to me, and she proceeded to tell me she was about to take "a huge dump." My embarassment soon turned to almost-falling-off-the-toilet laughter as she made the loudest fake fart noises I've ever heard. And she did indeed take a huge dump soon after. I wonder how many of you are scrunching up your faces thinking, "How gross! Why am I even reading this?" I know I've addressed this issue before, because I really don't think people should make such a big deal about what is a perfectly natural process. Sure it may have been inappropriate subject matter when your great-grandparents were dressing in their Sunday best's and having tea parties in the courtyard, but times, they are a-changing. The majority of the population has become far more liberal and loud-mouthed. Many of the same activities in which we participate today were prevalent back in the day; they were just kept more on the DL (DL = down and low for those of you with great-grandparents reading over your shoulders). Everybody has sex sooner or later. Everybody's been farting since they day they were born. And if you don't take a dump on a regular basis, that's just downright unhealthy. I think my only advice for you today is to be more understanding and open-minded of other people. If you drop your expectations of how a person should act, you'll be far less shocked or surprised when they do something that you might consider out of the ordinary. And hey, maybe you'll learn something new about yourself. And maybe you'll like it, too!
Lisa | 10:07 PM

 
My blog is being weird and not loading correctly. Since I will be busy for the next couple days attending Summer Preview for Creighton, don't bother visiting the site.
There are a few new pictures up for now. I tried to scan more, but they weren't saving to the network for some reason. Hopefully, they should all be up after this weekend. Updates will be posted.
Happy Birthday to Tyffaney who turns 18 on Friday!!!
Lisa | 10:40 PM

 
Kara is the coolest, and this is why...

Kara is friends with a band named League from Buffalo, New York; and yesterday she shared with me the prestiged pleasure of meeting them. They are the cutest, nicest, most fun guys in the world. Their music rocks my socks, and they're absolutley great to hang out with. After spending the evening with them, Kara and I were on a natural high. I'm really quite tired as we didn't get home until after 3 AM last night, so in order to fully describe the greatness of this band and their roadies, I will have to write about them again later on.
Lisa | 10:57 AM

 
Last night was the second night in a row that I have stayed at Kara's house. Right now it is 9:44 AM CT and I just woke up. I am butt-tired and I am waiting for the pushy lady at the doctor's office to return my phone call. Normally I am not butt-tired at 9:44 AM 9:46 AM CT, but I went to bed after 4 AM CT, and therefore I did not get much sleep. Also, Kara has a dog, and I am not used to the "morning bark" alerting me that Abbie has to take her "morning poo." She proceeded to wake me up as only I, the non-colorblind, bipedal, opposable-thumbed Wonder Girl, could open the back door for her.
Lisa | 10:14 AM

 
Retroactive Entertainment

Last night I conformed with all the cool retro kids by going to see Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory at the Dundee Theater. Every weekend they play an old classic for their midnight movie. The seats are the best, because they're made with real cushions that allow your butt to sink down a couple inches and are covered in a soft, velvety fabric. It's only five bucks, and you get to sit with an awesome crowd. This is the kind of crowd that sings along with Grandpa Joe after Charlie finds a golden ticket. They snicker when the Oompa Loompa's dance moves look like sexual positions. They giggle when Grandpa Joe and Charlie have a suggested pedophiliac relationship. They holler when the snozzberries taste like snozzberries. And they clap and shout when Veruca Salt falls down the bad egg chute followed by her annoying portly father. My favorite parts were the little snippets of dialogue that stated that "There are 100 billion people in this world" and they reside on "each of the five continents." However, I'd have to say the best part of the whole experience was watching John Travolta's ultimate dance action in the preview for Staying Alive, "Coming This Summer." I've decided to try and make this a weekly activity for myself, so if you live in Omaha or its surrounding areas, please come join me. The younger of you are advised to adjust your curfews beforehand, and be sure to leave buffer time for getting home.
Once I get off my ass and go back to pick up a flyer, I will post a schedule of their midnight showings in the sidebar so that all can enjoy.
Lisa | 12:12 PM

 
Ambitious Bad Girls and Their Dorky Thieving Brothers

It's very stressful to try and play Hooky in West Omaha. Out here, everyone drives the exact same car - a metallic tan suburban, or some other SUV look-alike. Everytime you turn your head you see that truck and think, "Oh shit! I'm definitely gonna get caught. Oh wait, that's not my dad. That's just the lady from up the street. Whew!" This goes on once or twice every half hour while you're out on the road. That, my friend, is why when you play hooky, you go to a location that is somewhat close to where you're supposed to be, but not close enough that someone can spot your car in parking lot while driving by. That way when you're driving home, and someone you know passes you, you can just say the event let out early and you were on your way home. Also, avoid coming home smelling like the place at which you weren't supposed to be. For me, this usually involves chewing a piece of mint-flavored gum after downing some overly cream-and-sugared yuppie coffee drink. Despite all the effort I go through to not get caught, I think my dad secretly knows that I've been skipping church. And I'm really sorry that it offends him, but Catholic Mass is just not the place for me anymore. I think the fact that I don't feel sorry for my "sin" says something about how seriously I don't take it anymore. It's a sad way to live, but that's just the way it is. Maybe I'll go through some spiritual awakening during my first year at a Jesuit college. But don't hold your breath.

I hate Sundays with a passion. But I love Sunday mornings. So I guess I could say I hate SunDAYS, but if it's not in writing, it just wouldn't make sense. The over-emphasis on the second syllable would only make me sound like I hate Sundays even more than your average Sunday-hating Joe Shmoe. Anyhoo, back to Sunday mornings, or for those who like patterns, SunMORNS. I love my only chance at eating a decent breakfast. I love listening to the Pacific Street Blues on the radio. I love listening to my "Sunday Morning Jazz" cd that my brother stole on Friday. Every time he goes out of town, whether it be for a camping trip or a swim meet, he steals a bunch of my cd's. He seems to think he is going to listen to 60+ hours of music during the road trip. If I were on a road trip with a bunch of my peers, I'd spend more time chatting up a storm with the kids in the back seat of the van than being the dorky introverted kid that gets stuck in shotgun, away from all the cool backseat kids, left with nothing to do but talk to the teacher/sponsor or listen to a portable discman while staring hopelessly out the window. I was that kid once. The only advantages to being that kid are that you can make up for lost sleep time in a seat all to yourself, and you don't have to worry about flying out the window should you get into a car accident because you're the only one who who buckled your seat belt. I don't think my brother is that kid. So why does he need to take so many cd's? Better yet, tell me why he has to take all of my cd's. I admit I have great taste in music (*grin*), but the little rat needs to discover good tunes on his own. Or at least burn himself a copy of mine so we can both enjoy Sunday Morning Jazz.

This morning I opened my Calvin and Hobbes book, "It's A Magical World," for the first time. It really is a great book. It allows one to appreciate the childhood that is no longer. And it's always funny to see a six-year-old shout dictatorial threats in a manner of speech more articulate and with a vocabulary more versatile than your own. I also rediscovered my love for Dave Barry, humor columnist. He has my ideal job. He gets paid to write funny observations about life....much like a stand-up comedian! (Or their underappreciated scriptwriter.) My my, what a tangled web we weave. It's funny how everything in the world is strung together. One day you might be rambling on to your friends about some inane topic you're pretending to know more about than you actually do, when suddenly you realize it is quasi-related to your college major in six degrees or less, and you don't have to pretend you know what you're talking about anymore! Yay for life and its general awesomeness!
Lisa | 11:31 AM

 
Giddy as a Graduated Catholic School Girl

Whoo! Today Katie J told me she was engaged. I'm sooo happy for her. Nate is an awesome guy, and they've always made the best couple. He proposed to her on the 4th of July with real fireworks and everything. What a sweetheart. They're being smart about it and not getting married until after they graduate college, so mark your calendars, folks! 2005 will be an exciting year.
Lisa | 3:49 PM

 
Same Old, Same Old

Ah, the joys of buying new pants. I really did make an effort this time. I figured since I'm probably too big to fit into anything found in the juniors' section, I'd browse the women's section. Wrong! There were no simple jeans racks. Instead, the store decided to have an uber-huge blowout clearance sale; and all the clothes were haphazardly thrown onto racks. I saw maybe five pairs of jeans mixed in with capris and swimsuits and blouses. So I shuffled back over to the juniors' section. I finally found some pants that worked for me. I always do after a while. It just amused me to see the fitting rooms. One of the mothers was cleaning up dozens and dozens of clothes left behind in the room because her daughter couldn't even get inside to try on her mini shorts. The women's fitting rooms are much cleaner because grown-ups are nice enough to return their clothes to the racks if they don't fit. Little girls are oblivious to generosity, and they throw whatever they don't like on the floor for someone else to pick up. Oh yeah. I still hate the fashion industry for making every single pair of jeans some variation of "superlow, hip-hugger, show off your thong" pants. If I want boys to see my ass, I'll make sure of it. Until then, let me cover it. Please. Thank You. For Shopping Sluts-R-Us. Come Again.
Lisa | 2:45 PM

 
Insomniac

Normally I display insominiac-like qualities in that I can never really get to sleep before midnight. And then I just lie there in bed, indulging my creative genius by concocting stories and conversations and blog entries in my head. My brain's activity is at its peak right before I go to sleep, but I am too tired to act out any of my ideas. Normally I talk to Seth right before I go to sleep. The sound of his voice and knowing that he is all right calms me down. The other night he haphazardly hung up with me, and I haven't heard from him since. So of course, all sorts of worst-case scenarios entered my mind, keeping me awake and worried. Also, I've had feelings for my friend Tony on and off for the past three years. We've gone out a few times, smooched a bit, etc. Of course every time I start to like him again, he ends up telling me he just got a new girlfriend. Tha basically happened again last night, and I was feeling sort of betrayed and rejected, blah blah blah. And I lost five bucks somewhere in the parking lot after work. So all these things mushed together were not making for a good night. So I stayed up all night getting to know Tim, a guy from Omaha who emailed me from Hot or Not. He really seems like a cool person, and making a new friend helped alleviate my stress. I still couldn't get to sleep though. Not until 6 AM. Then I proceeded to have a dream about Bill, a coworker I've sort of had a crush on since I started working at Baker's. It really was a nice a dream, so I let it last until 1 in the afternoon, when I finally rolled out of bed. After a shower, a little bit of Ace Ventura, and some Easy Mac, I'm ready to get dressed and go to work. Gross fact: I eat Easy Mac for breakfast. Rick's out of town on a camping trip, and it's pretty nice having the house to myself for once. Sorry for ignoring your phone calls today, guys. I really was exhausted. I looked at the Caller ID, and it looks like ghost lady hasn't called yet. Good. I don't need to deal with any more shit right now.
Lisa | 2:38 PM

 
Major Creep Out

When I got home from work tonight, my dad told me that an old lady had just called for me. She didn't leave much of a message except that she would call back tomorrow. My dad thought he heard her say something about being too late, but she was so old and rickety that he couldn't understand half of what she said. The caller ID said "Herbert Brown." We've seen this number on our phone many times before, but we never really paid attention to who it was. I always thought it was one of mine or Rick's friends whose parents might have a different last name. Anyway, I tried to call the number back and I got a machine that said, "Sorry, but you must first dial a 1 before calling this number." So I dialed a 1. I got the same machine voice, but this time it said, "It is not necessary to dial a 1 before calling this number." You're joking, right? So I picked up the phone in the other room and tried returning the call one more time. A new computer-voice greeted me saying, "We're sorry, but this number has been disconnected or is no longer in service." WHAT?! How could they have called me then? My dad got majorly creeped out, thinking it was my mom or some other ghost. "She's waiting to call you back tomorrow when you're home alone and you can't hide," he said. Gee, thanks Dad. I didn't feel so comfortable trudging up the stairs to my dark bedroom, all alone, waiting for a dead woman to come eat me alive. We'll see what happens tomorrow.
Lisa | 9:49 PM

 
There's a fine line between determined and stubborn.

I lied... that's not my schedule. The journalism and art classes were full. But I put myself on the drop lists so that if someone drops the course, the teacher will try to get me in. SOMEONE DROP THE DAMN COURSE!!! It really sucks that I can't take the journalism class when it's my major. Instead I'm taking applied mathematics and intro to world politics. So much for balancing my course load. I've taken more math than 85% of the world. I don't want any more. As I've said before, I hate it when things don't go my way. I'm really sucky at choosing things, so when I do make a decision, I don't want any alternative results. When it came to picking a high school, college, or major, I never really put much thought into it. I kinda just went with the flow until I found something that sounded right. Once I found that something, I put it on a pedestal and made myself believe the reasons why it would be perfect for me. Then *BAM!* Major letdown. I've waited four years to take that damned art class. Seriously. I know there's always next semester, but I want it now!! Veruca Salt is my hero.
Lisa | 1:47 PM

 
My college schedule (I hope):

Human Variation

Art Fundamentals

Introduction to Mass Communication, plus Lab

Christianity in Context

Freshman Seminar

World Literature I

P.S. Bookcrossing meets Tuesday night at 7pm in the Borders Cafe on 72nd and Dodge. Be there or be square.
Lisa | 12:36 AM

 
Woot! This is the best night of my life. But not really the best. Just super awesome cool! I made tropical smoothies and registered for college classes. I went bowling with Tyffaney. I WANT a pair of bowling shoes...so comfy. But I slipped and fell in the process of making a spare. Silly me. Then we saw The Cover Story and ROONEY! I love Rooney as of right now. I love going to concerts of bands I've never heard of and absolutely falling in love with them (Rooney, 3 Day Meat Sale, Lucky Boys Confusion, etc). Not only that, but Sean Gecko (DJ for The River) wants to meet me! Woot! I've been getting emails from him for the last couple months through that Hot or Not shit. I'm too excited this evening to think straight. Maybe it's the Red Bull that made me hyper. Anyway, I will blog in the morning....maybe. *squeals* No more sugar for Lisa.
Lisa | 12:17 AM

 
There's a quiet sort of contemplative epiphany one can only achieve during the early morning hours when the world is fast asleep, yet you are standing alone and waiting in your raunchy cigarette stand at the local grocery store. And that epiphany is this: Caffeine is good.

Where have all the cowboys gone?
It's Sunday morning and there are NO customers. Everyone is sleeping or getting ready for church or skipping church and really going out to breakfast with their friends. The only purchases I ever see are doughnuts, coffee, newspapers, and cigarettes. The occasional booze hound comes in looking for his morning fix; but it's mostly doughnuts, coffee, newspapers, and cigarettes. And the customers are usually old people. Old people rule. Even more so when they are old cowboys.

*sniff* I get a whiff of the two trillion kinds of tobacco products sitting behind me. People are so picky about their poison. I play with the censor on the automatic conveyor belt. I thank God the Muzak CD has not yet been inserted into the intercom's cd player. Normal music is key to productivity. I scowl at the lady in the cafe for not making any coffee. I laugh at the middle-aged man who flirts with me in front of his pre-teen son. I long for a double shot of espresso, a glazed sour cream doughnut, and a barstool. I look around the store. And I look around again. And I think to myself, "Life is good... But not really."

I hate the phrase "That's fine." It never indicates a certainly positive or certainly negative response. "Sir, would you like fries with that?" "That's fine," he replies with unsuggestive body language. Was that nod or a shrug? What's he doing with his hands? Gah! I don't know! DO YOU WANT FRIES WITH THAT OR NOT?? A SIMPLE YES OR NO WOULD SUFFICE!! You are so not fine...punk.

I wonder if stand-up comedians ever have scriptwriters? Similar to that hot young chick who's got the right look, but has to lip synch to someone else's talent. I need to find myself a pawn with big eyes and a funny voice and good memorization skills. And maybe a pet cat. Cat owners make good pawns. Just look at the way they cater to their cat's every whim. I think I would want my pawn-comic to dress silly as well. All the better for a chance at a good laugh. Except I don't want to be a comedian's scriptwriter. Nobody takes you seriously if you dress silly and tell jokes all day long. That's why I'm going to be a journalist.

It's already after noon. Wake up you fools!!!
Lisa | 1:10 PM

 
What?! No shoutouts? No one has anything to say about my big trip to the west coast? I go through a lot of trouble to keep you guys entertained, and I demand some feedback. Punks. Show the love.
Lisa | 12:54 PM

 
I just got back from the movies with Emma. She was paying, so I let her pick the movie.... "Legally Blonde 2." That's all I can say. I think we may have lost IQ points for having watched it. I'm in awe as to how that became a successful movie. True, some of the attempted humor did make me laugh. But the overly coincidental plot reeked from having been pulled straight out of the scriptwriter's ass. Yeezus! I hate movies that are that unrealistic. But if you think Reese Witherspoon is hot, you should definitely see the movie. Personally, I think Luke Wilson should have been in more scenes, but such is life. Despite all my recent arguments with Seth, my week is turning out pretty well. I got to see my family, as well as some old friends. I'm all scraped and bruised from a gang fight (but I really just slipped on the only loose stone of the all-rock staircase in someone's backyard). I laid out on the beach at a lake and watched the fireworks above. Payday came sooner than I expected. I had a wicked dream this morning; but if I were to discuss it with you, I'd get in trouble for an OVERSHARE. I worked all day, and I go back to the chain gang tomorrow morning at 6 am!! The best part of my day: my rediscovered love for finger cots. Finger cots are a protective-wear that look (and feel) exactly like miniature condoms. They come in regular or ribbed for his or her pleasure. And for those S&M lovers, our new dominatrix finger cots come in black leather. Okay, now I've had my fun. Time for bed.
Lisa | 11:49 PM

 
MY TRIP TO CALIFORNIA

Tuesday, 7.1.2003 5:34 PM CT
“Parenthetical Notes Galore”

Blah! Just my luck. Blogger wasn’t working the day before I left for California, and now that I am back, my internet connection is kaput (sp?). So once again I am stuck writing my thoughts down for now until I can find some way to post them later. It doesn’t bother me much except for the fact that it makes the posting format look ugly. Oh well. What are you gonna do?

Today is Tuesday, and it’s already July!! Yeezus! I’m not ready. I finally got the guy who hit my car to choose a place for me to get the repairs done; however, I’ll be out of a car for a week and I’m not old enough to rent another one. I can be so unlucky sometimes. I went back to Mercy today to work on a powerpoint presentation for September. The Justice & Peace Club will be educating the school about the Pine Ridge Rez up in South Dakota, but since most of us already graduated, we have to help out next year’s seniors so they don’t feel so overloaded. Davies invited us back to her apartment and let us raid through her clothes and belongings. She is moving to Katmandu, Nepal in three weeks for a two-year teaching job (with the Peace Corps I think?), and she wants to get rid of all of her stuff. I nabbed a few skirts, some sandals, and her handmade vases/incense holders. Today I promised myself that I will no longer spend money on clothing, food products, makeup, knick-knacks, or any other useless junk I don’t need. I’m such a spoiled brat sometimes. I’m supposed to be saving for college, but I’d also like to get myself a new camera (possibly digital) and a plane ticket to Los Angeles (possibly for spring break?). Speaking of college, I still need to register for classes. I remember freshman year of high school where my goal was to get all my required credits done with first, and save the fun stuff for senior year. Psh, yeah well. This year I think I’m going to try and balance it out. I would like to enroll in a journalism class (of course) and some sort of art class (maybe even photography). I’ll thank God if I don’t have to take chemistry again!!

So now on to the fun stuff. You want to know how my trip to California went, right? *sigh* I’m still on a high from it, and I wish I was back there right now. The weather is much nicer there. I just showered this morning, and I’m already grossing myself out with stench. Blech. All I have to say is California is beautiful! Sure it has its boring highways and litter-filled ghettos like the rest of us, but for the most part, I couldn’t look away. And I do have good news. My schedule didn’t follow the itinerary completely, leaving me to enjoy the trip even more than the others. I was able to see my love while I was there. We only spent one day together, but it was fantastic enough to have me still thinking about it. You can catch me fantasizing about wanting to move to San Diego with him. But enough mush. I found some free time during my trip to write some stuff down, so here goes nothing…
Lisa | 8:10 PM

 
Alright, let's try this again...

All entries dated June 26th and after will be posted in chronological order, because I know everyone's a dildo, and they read my entries in the wrong order. Because the entries are so long, I have to post them one at a time. You'll live. And if it's all just TOO CONFUSING for you, wait until August and read the June/July Archives.
Lisa | 8:10 PM

 
Friday,6.28.2003 7:09 AM PT
“BlogNotes: Day Two”

Oy, the first day was definitely not what I’d call “the best.” The plane ride was okay; I didn’t get sick, and I was able to sit next to my dad both flights. Trips like these are supposed to help us bond, because Rick usually goes off with his swim team friends, and my dad and I are left in the dust to keep each other company. We got along for the most part. Once we arrived in San Diego we picked up our rental cars and made our way toward Los Angeles. It’s lucky I ate at the airport in Denver, because we drove straight to Six Flags/Magic Mountain (which is actually in Valencia, CA) without stopping for lunch. With the LA traffic, it took us three hours to drive about 150 miles. I slept in the back most of the way. Getting up at 3:30 AM CT to fly 1,300 miles pretty much wore me out. Upon arrival at Six Flags, there were two restaurants at which e could have dined: Red Lobster (mmm…) or Wendy’s. Of course we went to Wendy’s, but I had a lovely Mandarin Chicken salad with sesame dressing. Yum yum, eat ‘em up. Come to think of it, in the last week and a half, I’ve eaten Thai about four or five times. Anyway, We went to the theme park at 4 pm and planned to meet back at 10 pm. Six hours in the exact same theme park we visited last year, on the hottest and most humid day of the year, after we were all dead-tired from our early flights and long-ass drive… Great idea guys. My dad and I walked around, trying to stay where it was shady or windy. At first I had put on one of my bikini tops to avoid sweating more than I had to. But after we walked past ten guys (one of whom had yelled “You should put those on a shelf!”), my dad made me put a shirt on over it. It ended up not mattering because I would have been just as hot either way, and this way I’d be less sun-burned. (Caution: Lisa’s tummy is blindingly white!) the only part of the park I enjoyed was “Circo Magnifico” (everything is in Spanish here), where they had this totally awesome acrobatics show. My dad and I agreed that with the black lights and rave music, ecstasy would be our drug of choice should we decide to get messed up before the show. After we finally dragged everyone out of the park (kids and childish adults alike), we made our way to the motel. It is unbelievably hard to get 19 people to come to a consensus.
Bad things that happened on the way to the motel:
1. I lost my favorite necklace (which I found two days later).
2. My bikini strap broke, making it unwearable.
3. I had blisters between my toes from my flip-flops.
The motel was tolerable. Not great, but decent. After a shower I called my beloved, because I missed him dearly. He would’ve joined me at Six Flags had he not had to go to class that night. It’s awful, being so close, yet so far away. I went outside the room for some privacy and fresh air. Literally outside; the doors open up to the parking lot. While on the phone, I noticed some weirdo video taping me in my pajamas. WTF?! I went inside and tried to get some sleep, comforted by the fact that Seth said he would try to have dinner with me tonight. It took awhile to fall asleep, but luckily after three scoldings from my father, the partying kids next door finally shut their yaps.
Lisa | 8:09 PM

 
“BlogNotes: Day Three”

The alarm went off. I woke up, got dressed, and packed my things. Oh wait… the alarm clock was an hour off. We woke up at 6 am instead of 7 am. The extra hour provided me with a chance to write some BlogNotes. It also gave us the chance to realize that our rental car had a flat tire, and that we needed to find a way to get a tire repair. I’m sitting in the hotel room waiting for one of two things: 1) my family to come back, or 2) the rest of our group to wake up and go to breakfast at Denny’s across the street. The trip so far has been less than kind to me, but I’m really going to try to start over with a brand new day and enjoy what I can. Wish me luck!

Denny’s, 7:55 AM PT

After a phone call from Dad, I realized it would be at least half an hour before I saw any signs of life from the rest of our group, so I painted my nails (hot pink with glitter) and headed over Denny’s on my own. Denny’s in Valencia, CA is way better than that trashy shit you’ll find in Omaha. An overbearing Asian waitress took my order and gave me the best service I’ve seen so far. *BAM* My stuff was at the table right away. Lucky for her that I am a big tipper. I figured that since I’m on my own and I’ll be walking all day long, I’d splurge and get the Lumberjack Slam (aka, big breakfast). It’s rather peaceful and vacation-like sitting here by myself. I love just getting away from it all. Of course, I can’t get Seth off of my mind as I sit here alone in this two-person booth, wishing he was sitting across from me, my feet touching his, listening to him complain that the Tabasco sauce is not hot enough for his eggs and hashbrowns. *sigh* I really am obsessed with the guy, and we’re both fine with that. :)

Lumberjack Slam:
- 2 eggs (over easy)
- 2 pieces toast (wheat)
- hashbrowns
- 1 slice ham
- 2 slices bacon
- 2 small sausages
- 3 hot cakes
- Orange juice, coffee
It wasn’t until halfway through my meal that I realized I wouldn’t be able to finish it all. I hate waste. I would’ve gotten a bagel and yogurt, but they didn’t have that on the menu. :(

California = lots of Mexicans and Japanese. It’s the only place where minorities are the majority. :)

The best bumper sticker I’ve seen on this trip: “BUSH IS A PLANT”
Lisa | 8:08 PM

 
Sunday, 6.29.2003 12:18 PM PT
“I’m falling even more in love with you…”

Whew, it’s been a fast couple of days. My schedule has been a little more packed, which means less time to journal. Alas, I am faithful, so here we go…
I think I left off eat breakfast on Friday morning. Lovely as it was to eat by myself, I had to go back again a trillion hours later when the rest of my party finally rolled out of bed. I stuck with a simple cappuccino and a bowl of fruit. Yum yum, eat ‘em up. Then it was off to Los Angeles. Our first stop was deceivingly “glamorous” Hollywood! Walking up and down Hollywood Blvd., we visited the Ripley’s Believe it Or Not Museum and Grauman’s Chinese Theater. Those two places were my favorite. My dad was freaking out because there were so many sex/fetish shops. DUH! This is Hollywood! This is where places like Frederick’s has more transvestites than tourists…unless you’re a transvestite tourist. And of course my brother and his friends, too young to know better, stopped in every little dime-a-dozen tourist shop that advertised “Five t-shirts for ten dollars!” I don’t mind them too much though. They allow me to get my cheesy travel souvenirs that I can use to impress my imaginary friends. I enjoyed most of our long walk down the boulevard. Unfortunately, I am fat, and my legs rub together when I walk. Wearing a skirt on a hot day caused chaffing, and later a painful rash. (Overshare, as Kara would say.) Jeans today though; I’m smart. My Mary Jane’s (shoes, not drugs) gave my rug burns on the backs of my feet, too. However, I am tough, and I kicked ass at sucking it up and taking it like the man that I’m not. After our self-tour of Hollywood (cheaper than paying five bucks a pop for the “Trolleywood Tour”), we made our way down Santa Monica Blvd… and the sun was up. :) Traffic sucked, but we passed a lot of cool sights and the Bootmobile (!!) This was a car in the shape of a boot. Woot! It was foggy on Santa Monica Pier, but that didn’t stop me from having a good time. I took some pictures of the beach, yadda yadda yadda. The breeze was cold, and my dad insisted on buying me a hoodie. Whatever. Free clothes :) One guy was painting gorgeous miniature landscapes on the undersides of seashells. I wish I had gotten one. As usual, my brother and his friends followed he scent of funnel cakes and rollercoasters, while my dad and I split off to enjoy the more “natural” side of the pier (an old-time carousel, walks along the pier, barnacles, etc.). Unfortunately, natural also included a score of homeless people everywhere you looked, one of whom had forgotten to take his medicine and accused us of ripping off the post card industry because we had cameras.
Next was Santa Monica Place and 3rd Street… A mall full of stores that can be found anywhere you go (lame) and a street made only for pedestrians. Along Third Street were many, many stores for which I did not care to shell out my cash in exchange for overpriced designer goodies. Instead I spent a great deal of time admiring Adam Ho, 14-yr-old boy wonder, who put on a wonderful guitar show for all of us in the middle of the street. There was also a half-pint Elvis impersonator and a guy with a monkey. The guy stood next to his music box while the monkey just walked around and took money from people. Cute monkey, lame pastime. It always took forever to leave somewhere, because everyone was continually spotting a “cute store” they wanted to go to. (There were many early-teen girlies on this trip, mind you. Perhaps I forgot to mention that my brother belongs to three swim teams, two of which are co-ed.) Anyway, everyone said they wanted to go the anthropology store, and I thought, “Awesome! Finally a store worth taking a look at.” Though I do admit I spent some time in The Body Shop (I’m a card member) – all-natural shit is a weakness of mine. Anyway, it turned out that it was actually another designer clothing store called “Anthropologie.” Blah. My dreams are shattered once again. Speaking of shattered dreams, we spent so much time in Santa Monica that I was unable to go to Long Beach and have dinner with my love :) Another HOWEVER…. Seth called me and told me he would come down to San Diego on Saturday and spend the day with me. WOOT! *me jumping up and down and grinning bigger than ever*
Lisa | 8:07 PM

 
Continued...

We drove back down to San Diego, getting lost on the way (the layout of their streets is awful), checked into the hotel, shit, showered, shaved (as my mom would say), and took forever to fall asleep because I was so damned anxious. :) Alarm clock rings on Saturday morning, and I wake up thinking of only my boyfriend and how much I miss him and how I can’t wait to see him. Woot! I packed a bag of magazines and cd’s thinking it’d be a few boring hours at the swim meet before Seth met me there. As soon as I sat down on a bench, I took out my cell phone – five missed calls! Seth was waiting for me outside the other gate, and luckily I hadn’t kept him waiting too long. I was sooo happy to see him. From that moment until the end of the day was definitely the best par of the trip. I gave Seth a huge hug, and with that, we were off. He kidnapped me for the whole day. Everyone else went to the swim meet and the beach – Boring! Seth and I went and really enjoyed San Diego. Our first stop was Balboa Park, where they had over 15 museums and the most beautiful courtyards I’d ever seen. Since we got there before anything had opened, we sat on a bench under a tree, sipping our coffee, people watching, and enjoying the nice morning weather. It was so wonderful sitting there, just the two of us, with his arm around me. Haha, I’m still on a high from how great yesterday was. Once the museums opened up, we walked over to the Robert H. Fleet Science Center. Besides me, this was the only other thing Seth wanted to visit in San Diego. It was a pretty cool museum filled with interactive exhibits and the country’s first IMAX theater. After that we went to the botanical gardens. Seth’s got a liking for botany, as well. It was gorgeous there. I took some pics of the flora, but I kinda wish I had taken more of Seth and me together. Oh well. We left Balboa Park and drove around aimlessly in search of food.
We ended up at El Indio Mexican Shop. Yeah! This is what I’d been waiting for… real Mexican food, not that government cheese shit you find at taco Bell. I indulged in a carnitas (pork) taco and a carne asada (marinated steak) taco. To drink, horchata, a Mexican drink made of rice, milk, and cinnamon. Mmm… God, I was so full after lunch, but I wouldn’t have had it any other way. The food was so worth it. Afterwards, we drove around aimlessly again. We pretty much did that any time we went driving. We ended up in the ghetto, where we were liable to get shot had we stayed there any longer than we did… F*king gringos. Then we wandered around the fancier part of downtown, which was a lot like the Old Market we have here. Stores, shops, and restaurants galore. More and more driving around, enjoying the sights and each other’s company. Sometimes it was a good thing we got lost, because we ended up at cool places, like Seaport Village. It was a typical wharf with novelty shops, restaurants, and a gorgeous view of the harbor. We ate dinner and walked along the docks at night. Smooched a bit :) Mmm, so romantic. Then came the sad part: time to go. He dropped me off at my hotel, and we said our goodbyes. I’m a little sad, but not much. We’ll see each other again soon enough.
Like I said, today is Sunday and I’m still on a high. Yesterday was one of the most enjoyable days of my life. It may not sound like much to you guys, but I’m in love, so of course it was all great to me. I was surprised that my dad let me stay out the whole day without having to come back and check in or anything. My dad has yet to meet Seth, but I’m sure he’d approve. They mighty even get along. Okay, okay, back to my vacation….
Sunday morning, we Bloomingdale’s were the first ones ready to go as usual. It’s kind of lame when the coach tells us to be ready to go by 6:45 am, but the rest of the team doesn’t saunter out for breakfast until 7:15 am. Whatever. My dad said I didn’t have to go to the meet today, because it would be hot and crowded and suck-ass boring (Note: not his exact words). So I went back to sleep until 11 am and ventured out into the wonderful world of Rosecrans St. I always called it Rosencrantz St. because of my history with Hamlet. This was basically me time, doing my own thing, exploring the city as I pleased. I got some new batteries for my camera, and some lovely sea shells from the coolest candle store I’ve ever seen. I would’ve gotten more stuff, but my funds were limited, and I didn’t want to buy anything I couldn’t take back on the plane. I hiked down the street to See’s Candies – gourmet candy totally worth the sky-high price. I got some for my family, too, because I’m just that nice. I headed over to In-N-Out Burger in hopes of purchasing a t-shirt, but it looked like one could only buy them online, so Whatever. Not a big deal. I crossed the street to Starbucks where I ordered my usual Grande Tazo Chai Crème Frappucino, and sat down to blog. My my, I am filling up this legal pad quickly. I went to Jack-In-The-Box for lunch, because the have the coolest mascot ever! It’s basically a guy in a business suit with a giant clown head. Seth sent me an antenna toper for Christmas, so I got a Bobble Head Jack this time. And some taquitos and fries. I love Mexican food cooked by real Mexicans. :) So here I am in the hotel lobby, finishing up some writing, and waiting to go to the beach. More blogging later…

Noteworthy things I’ve seen in California:

The plant-life here is absolutely amazing. Gorgeous flowers EVERYWHERE, monstrous palm trees line the streets… Oh I love it.

Driving along the I-5, there are signs that say “CAUTION:” and then have a picture of a family running across the highway. There’s no border patrol on some parts of the highway, so you have to be careful not to run over any escaping illegals. Seth thinks they should paint little sombreros on the signs. It’s the sort of thing that is funny and sad at the same time. Like when your friend trips over their own feet and falls on their ass.
Lisa | 8:06 PM

 
Wednesday, 7.2.03 11:17 AM CT

The beach was wonderful. We went to Ocean Beach, which is supposedly the coolest one of all. There were many great surfshops and bong shops and burger joints named Hodad’s. I loved the fact that you could walk into a place half-naked and still get service (because we were right next to the beach). I went to use the bathroom at Starbucks, and I had to pay a quarter to lock the door. It was totally weird. Having already eaten lunch, I sat with my group at Hodad’s while they waited for their tripped-out waiter to finally get the order made. I of course went off on my own again, exploring as I went. I took random pictures, bought a sarong to make me look more local, and headed out to the beach. This time my bikini was a little more appropriate, but what was my dad gonna do about it anyway? Send me across town to the hotel to change into the spare one-piece I didn’t have? Psh, whatever. I laid out on my towel to get some sun, and of course every clueless bozo that walked by stopped right in front of me, preventing me from getting the tan that I’ll never have. I took some more pictures and made my way toward the water. Most of the people in my group were too chicken shit to go into the sea because they thought the water was tool cold. Whatever, it wasn’t that bad. I started choking the first time I tasted that oh so salty water, and I never really got used to it. I hooked up with some local boys who taught me to body surf, or at least not kill myself every time a wave broke shore. The waves thrashed me about, and I admit I accidentally flashed a few people when my top fell down. I didn’t care though. Boobs are boobs, and if you can’t get over it, you need to go back to junior high. Time to leave came before I was ready, so I slowly paddled my way back to shore. I went back to my room with sand in places that will not be mentioned at this time. All the other kids went swimming and hot tubbing, but I took a nice hot shower and did some laundry. My brother didn’t even bother to invite my dad and I to the pizza party our group had in the lobby. Fuckin’ putz. We fell asleep without dinner, and I skipped breakfast in the morning. On Monday I was able to sleep in a little later, and then I went to Mission Beach with some of the girls. They all wanted to get henna tattoos, but I bought myself a couple of t-shirts (because I really need more shirts! NOT). I met up with my family later on that day at the airport, where I was finally able to nab some grub. I hadn’t eaten in almost 24 hours, and I was sore from my ocean activities the day before. I had the best 5-cheese and fresh tomato pizza in the world. I bought more JUNK at the newsstand, took more pics, etc. Pretty boring day.
We flew home, stopping in Denver along the way. Blah, blah, blah. End of trip. We didn’t get home until 10 PM CT, and of course my internet was being retarded. I had many emails, but I was unable to read any of them. So I wrote everything down, and am now finally posting it. And now I must go register for my college classes. Ciao for now.
Lisa | 7:57 PM

 
My internet connection is almost never working anymore, so the only way you can reach me for now is via telephone. As for entries, they'll be up. Just have patience. Happy 4th of July everyone.
Lisa | 4:26 PM

 
Blogger fucked up once again, and it won't allow me to post my entry about California because it is too long. Therefore, you get it in installments. Deal.
Lisa | 12:53 AM

 
I don't like girls who dress all skanky and hit on my boyfriend and go to his house at 10 pm at night to do math homework when you know they really want more. Luckily, he doesn't go for skanks.
Lisa | 11:56 PM

 
Brush With Fame

On the way home today, I drove passed a nice car with the license plate "1600 PEN," which was an obvious reference to the White House. Inside was a black man with some sort of officer's uniform. As we all know, there's basically only one black guy in the White House these days, so it is only safe to assume that I drove home next to Colin Powell. Woot!

I had a ginormous slice of greek pizza from the all natural grocery store and it was delish. My new favorite drink is Tazo, and pita chips rock my world. I guess I sorta got back on my hippie kick after a visit from all my J & P pals today. More on that later. Because Blogger was an idiot (They revamped everything to the new blogging format, which sucks for those of us who are not FIVE YEARS OLD!) and my internet connection blew ass, I'm going to have to back track on entries. Expect them to be posted tomorrow at the latest.

P.S. Welcome back me!!
Lisa | 11:08 PM