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Saturday, February 7

For those worried about my new blog, it has been moved to here. Enjoy.

Sunday, November 2
I ran out of pee. I'm sorry.

Tuesday, October 28
Don't have a cow, man. Give one instead.

Heifer International

Friday, October 24
"We've all lost our children. It's like the children of America are dead to us. Just look at them, for God's sake -- violent on the streets, comatose in the malls, narcotized in front of the TV. In my lifetime something terrible happened that took our children away from us. I don't know if it was the Vietnam war, or the sexual colonization of kids by industry, or drugs, or TV, or divorce, or what the hell it was; I don't know which are causes and which are effects; but the children are gone, that I know. So that trying to protect them is little more than an elaborate exercise in denial. Religious fanatics and superpatriots, they try to protect their kids by turning them into schizophrenics; Episcopalians and High Church Jews gratefully abandon their kids to boarding schools and divorce one another so they can get laid with impunity; the middle class grabs what it can buy and passes it on, like poisoned candy on Halloween; and meanwhile the inner-city blacks and poor whites in the boonies sell their souls with longing for what's killing everyone else's kids and wonder why theirs are on crack. It's too late; they're gone; we're what's left." - Russell Banks, "The Sweet Hereafter"

I'll work on the archives this weekend.

Monday, October 20
Three of many ideas for campaign posters...

I saw that minivan again today. The one with the "WUT EVA" license plate and the "I *heart* Pilates" bumper sticker. Too funny.

My faith in life has been restored (for the time being). I had the whole house to myself this morning and it was nice to sit on the porch in the swing-a-ding-ding and drink my coffee and not really care about anything except for where are all the fucking bugs coming from?

I came home from work with a head full of ideas for my campaign posters. I sent a few ideas to some friends via email in hopes of getting some feedback. I'll probably post them once they're finished. I aimed for humor and as we all know, I'm a magnificent archer. Even ask my old gym teacher.

My dad's birthday is coming up and I don't know whether I should buy him a new coffee pot or just get him a card. I got a card from him for my 18th birthday. It said, "Happy Birthday. Your present is coming later." I never did get a present. My brother got a brand-new car. But that's not really important, I guess.

Colin came home from Los Angeles this weekend and he was supposed to see me, but he never returned my call. I was even going to take him out to dinner. Oh well. It'll give me more time to read that book I borrowed from him.

I found a cocklebur stuck to the bottom of my jeans. *sigh* It's been too long...

Sunday, October 19
a picture says a thousand words

Yesterday I was sitting at the stoplight just waiting for my car to explode with me inside it. I could feel it coming. I could hear it coming... Well, I'm not dead yet, but just you wait.

"I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to what light I might have."
~ Abraham Lincoln

Saturday, October 18
Life is not unbearable. I've been through much worse and gotten through it. People at school used to refer to me as a "strong" person. They've seen me go through rough patches and they've seen me take it like a man, so to speak. This is not what I would call a rough all. This is what I would call "Lisa is slacking when she doesn't need to be, and maybe indulging in a few other unhealthy activities." But it doesn't mean my life is unbearable. There are days when I'm the happiest girl you've ever met, and there are other days when I just sit and think about all the things I hate about life and it all just snowballs up and makes me cry or write depressing blog entries. But that's just who I am. I'm an emotional rollercoaster, and you guys seem to think that I'm always stuck in the valleys. I suppose I don't write about my happiness as often because I'm actually out enjoying it. And really, the things that make me joyful are so menial that you guys would get bored with it and tell me to "spice things up." But if you insist....

Yesterday my politics class was cancelled because it was the first day of fall break and Dr. Meeks is just cool like that. So after bombing our world lit midterms, we walked around campus enjoying the nice weather. There's this long, stone sign right in front of the Reinhart Alumni Library that everyone like to sit on. It's convenient because there's an ashtray next to it and it faces the mall so you can people watch. Our campus is so beautiful this time of year. I see photographers walking around every day staring through their lenses at the orange and red trees and the leaves blowing across the brick promenade and couple sitting with their arms around each other on shaded benches and groups of freshmen playing frisbee on the Kiewit lawn. I'd post lots and lots of pictures, but alas, I don't have any. Russ offered to sell me his old digital camera for fifty bucks, so hopefully I'll figure out how it all works and post some beauty for you.
Talia is a wonderful girl. She has short, bleach-blonde curls that sit on top of her head and look great all the time even though most days she tries to cover them up with a bandana or hat. She where's tons of eyeshadow but it looks good on her and she's tan and well-built and wears big earrings. And we can talk about anything. It's great. Yesterday we people-watched, but it was mostly guy-watching. I thought it would be weird going to school with boys, but it feels pretty natural. There's a lot of cute ones to be found on our campus, but I'm sure that's true for any university.
Talia demanded that I go to a party with her tonight, so I believe that is what I'm going to do. It'll be good for me since all of my other friends went home for fall break. I hate saying goodbye. Even if it's just until tomorrow, I hate it. Lauren looked so sad when she realized she wouldn't see me or Dana for a whole week. I promised I'd pick her up from the airport next Sunday, and I can guarantee there will be lots of hugging. And lots of hernias. She took all of her dirty laundry home with her and the bag was sooo heavy. We made Alroy carry it and he almost fell over. I didn't know they even made travel bags that big. It reminded me of the 600-pound puppet I saw on Crank Yankers.
I'm off to shower and do other hygenically clean habits. I've been asleep since 5:00 pm yesterday with the exception of a few phone calls. Blech. Where's my toothbrush?

Friday, October 17
I was thinking about tattoos yesterday. I've always told myself I'd never get one. They're too permanent. But I was thinking about them anyway. Maybe one with my mom's initials. Then my dad would spot it and get angry and then recognize the initials and then he would relax and say, "Oh, okay." But I'm not a fat, bald biker dude so I can't have a tattoo that relates to my mom. Jess got one for Ani DiFranco and then she got her zodiac sign. I don't know if I would want anything like that either. It would definitely have to be something that encompasses the real me, so when you look at it you just think "Lisa." What am I saying? I don't want a tattoo.

Thursday, October 16
My mom used to sing to us when we were kids. You could definitely tell she was a smoker. I don't remember how I felt about that. I recall thinking I'd never become a smoker though. Ironic, don't you think? She sang this one so much I eventually became sick of it:

Crazy, I'm crazy for feeling so lonely
I'm crazy, crazy for feeling so blue
I knew you'd love me as long as you wanted
And then someday you'd leave me for somebody new
Worry, why do I let myself worry?
Wond'ring what in the world did I do?
Crazy for thinking that my love could hold you
I'm crazy for trying and crazy for crying
And I'm crazy for loving you
Crazy for thinking that my love could hold you
I'm crazy for trying and crazy for crying
And I'm crazy for loving you.

~ Patsy Cline (Willie Nelson remake)

Tuesday, October 14
let the record show

AlLyBaR486: lisa b, i am seriously sorry for the rude and inconsiderate comments that my friends and i have presented on your blog. you gave us your personal blog to read and we took advantage of it. i admit, the comments were a little out of control, but i think we were all soo shocked by what you were writing. it was soo different from your pee into the wind. i sincerely apologize, and propse for you to take down the comment barrier and allow us to comment with respect. if there is ever another probelm you can put the barrier back up. i really do enjoy reading your blog and hope that you will be my friends and i another chance
lisabee16: i'll think about it and i appreciate the apology
AlLyBaR486: ok and i am seriosuly sorry
lisabee16: okay
AlLyBaR486: i didn't mean to bring you down and hurt your feelings in anyway
AlLyBaR486: good luck on your mid terms

i guess i'm a little skeptical, but can you blame me?

I would have to say that one of my favorite plays is "No Exit" by Jean Paul Sartre. It's one of the few pieces of literature I actually read all the way through in high school. Another favorite work would have to be Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451. These works exhibit such a nihilistic point of view that I find most intriguing. This, coupled with the stoicism illustrated in William Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar," makes me become more and more interested in depressing qualities that humans so often tend to posess. I used to want to be a psychologist, and now that I am debating what to do with my life yet again, I think I may indulge myself with a psychology or philosophy class next semester. I also want to take art and Spanish. I've been ignoring my studies lately to immerse myself in the pleasure that art projects bring me. I love my creative outlet. And I have a large interest in the Mexican-American culture. Ever since my trip to California I have wanted to learn Spanish and visit Mexico and all sorts of crap like that. Talia invited me to Cancun with her for spring break, and if I can manage to save up enough money, lose enough weight, and get a decent tan, I may just take her up on the offer.

I'm supposed to be on my way to school right now....then work....then more school. However, despite everything we do, that little battery light on the dashboard wants to stay lit up. My brother gets to drive a brand-new Cavalier for free, and I get to drive a car that breaks down on me every two weeks for free. It's sort of crucial that I be at school today since it is midterm week, but alas I can't go anywhere. It's not fair. I'm not going to be able to go back to Creighton next semester because my grades will be too low and I'll probably lose my scholarship. It's just not fair. There is only one benefit from getting to stay home today: coffee. I can make as much of it as I want and drink as much of it as I want and no one can stop me. Muah ha ha ha. But there's still that chance of failing my anthropology midterm.... Oy.

i made three more collages today. and a poem of sorts:

life lessons
tough problems
chocolate-dipped drama
how can you lose?
your passion
really big deal
rush hour
good news
circle of friends
your words
life's little complexities
for you
taking control
ask your doctor
no purchase necessary
the most interesting

Sunday, October 12
I always found it interesting that my grandma has been married four times. My mom was one of four daughters, and each had a different dad. I never knew who my biological grandpa was, but the one I have now is pretty awesome. He's the only person in the world I let call me "Liz." He grew up in Maine and has this crazy obsession with lighthouses. He taught me how to fish. I caught a bass and a few bluegill that day. He drinks scotch on the rocks. He rules at card games and carpentry. For my birthday he made me a frame for my favorite puzzle so I could hang it on the wall. He let me crash at his house. He taught me how to sautee mushrooms and eat mussels. He backed me up when I had debates about religion with my grandma. He didn't give me shit for anything. I used to to go hang out with him and grandma every day after work. I miss that.

Saturday, October 11
I'm in the mood, get ready. - Sublime

Blue October
Music Box Live
25 October 2003
$14 advance

BE THERE - it's one of the last shows before the place closes down. Call me if you wanna come.

Oh yeah, and some time after fall break there is going to be a pumpkin-carving party and some painting and free food and scary movies, etc. down in Gallagher Hall. It should be fun, so call me for that, also.

Friday, October 10
My boss called me today to let me know what time to come in to work tomorrow. The first thing she said was, "You didn't look too good this morning." "Uh... I wasn't wearing any makeup, but thanks." I thought I looked fine, but after that I wasn't feeling too good about myself.

Midterms are next week and I have at least four tests and a paper. I think it's time I start acting like all my studious friends and actually get some schoolwork done. It's a well-known fact that I always screw around instead of taking responsibility, but I suppose I could make myself change for just a week. However, today is Friday and I am going to indulge in my art projects because that is what makes me content. It's a nice day, but a little too windy to be working outside.

I was showing my friend Talia my online photo album in the library today. It was nice to reminisce a little. I have a zillion more photos that I never posted, but I think that I'm going to just hang them up around my room. If you're that desperate to check them out, give me a call and I'll let you come over.

Someone just rang the doorbell, and I'm really hoping it's not for me. I have a feeling it might be the lady from down the street. I was supposed to write a news story on her, but I changed my mind and never emailed her to tell her that. Oops! I hope that in all the hustle and bustle of her daughter's wedding she forgot about me. I obviously forgot about her.

Tuesday, October 7
Remember This?

Pretty In Pink. Ducky shows up at the record store. He serenades Andie. She breaks his heart.

Try a Little Tenderness
[This is for you] Ooh she may be weary
And them young girls they do get weary
Wearing that same old shaggy dress
But when they get weary
[You gotta] try a little tenderness

[Tell you, might not believe it, but]
You know she's waiting
Just anticipating
The thing that she'll never, never, possess,no,no
But while [all the time] she's without it
Go to her and try just a little bit of tenderness
[Thats all you gentlemen gotta do]

Oh,but its one thing
It might be a bit sentimental yeah, yeah
She has - her greaves and care
But the soft words [they] are spoken so gentle
But, oh, that makes it, makes it easier to bear, yeah

You wont regret it
No no,
Them young girls they dont forget it
[Cause] Love is their whole, whole happiness Yes, yes, yeah

And its all so easy
Come on and try
Try a little Tenderness
Yeah Try
Just keep on trying

You've got to love her
Squeeze her
Don't tease her Make love [Get to her]
Hold her tight
Just, just try a little tenderness
Thats all you gotta do
Youve gotta hold her tight

One more time
You`ve got to love her
hold her Don't tease her
Never leave her
Make love to her
Hold her, man

Try a little tenderness
[Just one time] God have mercy now

All you`ve gotta do
Love her
You've gotta hold her
Don't squeeze her
Never leave her Y
ou gotta now, now, now

Watch it, tell everybody
Try, Try a little tenderness

You gotta make love
Don't tease her
Never leave her
Rub her down
Smooth her, soothe her
Move her
Love her
Rub her
Gotta gotta, zak it to her
Try some tenderness

Oh yeah
Little tendernes
Gotta, lord you gotta hold her
Squeeze her Never leave her

~ Otis Redding

Sunday, October 5
Homecoming last night was pretty fun. I invited Sean to come with because we don't spend enough time together. Psh! The service at dinner sucked, and the food was so not worth the price. Nobody danced with me, but I did some people watching and could not help staring at KJ when he danced. He's so....mesmerizing. I saw Snoza (ex-bf) there and of course I tried saying hello like 50 bajillion times and he just ignored me. So then when I walked away, his date looked at me like I was a bitch and they thought I was angry. Hah. Angry over him? Puh-lease. The night, all in all, was very pleasant and I'm glad I went. And I don't care what psycho-stalker-bitch says, I was and am totally hot.

I found my Jimi Hendrix cd and I'm loving it. I listened to the blues this morning and it was all I needed to mellow out and enjoy my day. I have a paper due tomorrow, but I have the incentive of going to see "Matchstick Men" to get me through it. If I get my paper done, I can go out and enjoy myself. That's the way the world works, or should anyway.

I'm getting kind of bored with this blog. See me for further instructions.

Saturday, October 4
So this is the mix I've been listening to lately. A lot. And I like it. A lot.

Squeeze - "Black Coffee in Bed"
Otis Redding - "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay"
Otis Redding - "Pain in My Heart"
Smokey Robinson & the Miracles - "You Really Got a Hold on Me"
Blue October - "Calling You"
Rusted Root - "Send Me on My Way"
Rufus Wainwright - "Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk"
Rufus Wainwright - "Hallelujah"
Nico - "These Days"
Sam Cooke - "You Send Me"
Live - "Lightning Crashes"
Dido - "Thank You"
Gary Jules - "Mad World"

P.S. Put it in 'shuffle' mode.

Okay, so I had some thoughts, but I spewed them out somewhere else. It was a rather long entry. I don't feel like copying and pasting, so you'll just have to ask me later.

I got my tires checked and I washed my car. I spilled Vanilla Coke all over the driver's side the other day, so at least now it's not sticky anymore. But I have to drive people around tonight and they're gonna be all dressed up. This means I'd better clean out the inside of my car so they don't get stained with god knows what. Yeah, I'm a pig.

P.S. Homecoming is tonight and it's gonna kick ass. No more of that all-girl, catholic high school shit.

Thursday, October 2
P.S. I've got this new blog (that makes like what, 352 now?). It's a public blog, of course, but it's sorta private. It's the real me. I dunno. Maybe I'll give you the URL if you ask politely.

Rule of thumb, I don't do retractions. However, I do make rearrangements. So here were a few posts from earlier:

"some idiot girl keeps calling my cell and i can't tell what the fuck she's saying. it's just loud, static-y yelling in my ear. i hope she's dying. no one will come to help her because she's screaming at me and then hanging up. someone call her up and find out who the hell she is: (402) 630-2660. fuck you, bitch."

"all right, this sucks ass. she called me a few times more. my dad answered it while i was in the bathroom and she gave him some fake name and i dunno what. he said she sounded heavy and manly. i can't verify that, seeing as how i don't know who she is. but whoever you are, this is so not cool."

Yeah, so I don't really know who this girl is, nor do I care. She kept bringing up things that happened way back when, like when I got the whole senior class to hate me for a week. It's over and done with, move on! If she has nothing better to do than call me conceited (in so many words) and then continue to ask me questions about my life, so be it. And I have no problem with anonimity. I've indulged in it myself. But seriously, "period sista," get a life.

I started my period yesterday. While it ensures another month of a fruitless womb, it also torments me with cramps and bloating and mood swings. It hasn't gotten too bad yet, and luckily I have a weekend of rest ahead of me. With the exception of homecoming. And the two research papers I have to write. And my messy room I have to clean. Damn it!

I'm supposed to go see "Matchstick Men" with Sean tonight, except he hasn't been answering his phone. I hate the way he screens his calls. Answering machines always intimidate me.
"Dear Buttlick. Answer your god damned phone. Love Zombie."

Also, thank you for linking me. Haven't seen you in forever.

You are an Intrapersonal thinker...

Intrapersonal thinkers:
  • Spend a lot of time thinking about and trying to understand themselves
  • Reflect on their thoughts and moods, and work to improve them
  • You understand how your behaviour affects your relationships with others

    Other Intrapersonal thinkers include:
    Sigmund Freud, Gandhi, Grahame Greene

    Careers which suit Intrapersonal Thinkers include:
    Psychologist, Teacher, Pilot, Child care worker, Explorer, Drama therapist

    What kind of thinker are you?

    My dad made me cry at dinner tonight. Not on purpose, mind you. It was because of these two stories:

    #1. A nine-year-old boy was caught stealing cookies in his parents' home. As a punishment, his parents wrapped him up from head to toe in duct tape. He looked like a mummy, except for a small opening around the nose for him to breathe. Then they made him lie in his bed all night long while they went out and the babysitter watched tv downstairs. The boy ended up vomiting and died.

    #2. A father was punishing his three-year-old daughter for wetting the bed. He forced her to stand naked on a bucket with her arms in the air for 20 hours. Every time she fell off the bucket, he would hit her with a stick. After 20 hours of torture, she finally fell down to the ground, where her father beat her to death with the stick.

    I hate the world.

    I hate dumbfucks because...
    They beat up the passenger side of my car with a baseball bat for no apparent reason.
    They cut me off on the interstate during rush hour traffic.
    They make a point of telling me when I have a huge zit on the middle of my face.
    They treat me differently just because I can't afford to live on campus.
    They call me names and try to play it off as "Signs of affection."
    They don't answer their phones or return my calls for days at a time.
    They hassle me about my bad habits.
    They charge way too much for nasty fast food.

    Dumbfucks are just....fucking dumb.

    Monday, September 29

    I had the hiccups and Lauren told me to rub my earlobes and they'd go away. I can't believe it, but it fucking worked! However, the disruption of my "balancing juices" has made me a little dizzy.

    I know you believed it would never happen, but I updated the sidebar. Check it out.
    Admittedly, in high school, I plagiarized from essays written by people in college. Now that I'm a college student myself, I posted some essays for you high schoolers to copy from. The topics are pretty specific, but maybe you'll find something. I'll post more as they come. Enjoy.

    Well I couldn't feel any more pathetic if I tried. I wasted my weekend sleeping, whether it was in my bed or somebody else's. I wore my pajamas for the last 24 hours, even out in public. I was yearning for a couple days off so I could get my shit done. Now that I got them, I slept them away. Fucking idiot. The dirty laundry pile is four feet tall and I never got around to doing my interview. I'll shoot myself before I ever watch another movie again. Good god, how I am disappointed in myself. My crush on Sean is quickly dissipating, however my headaches are not. I miss Seth and I'm sick of school. I'm not in the mood to do anything. I'd really like to escape. My escape usually includes a nap, but I've gotten more sleep this weekend than I could ever know what to do with. Somebody just shoot me or something. I need a wake-up call.

    Saturday, September 27
    I fell asleep at Amelie last night because let's face it, it's just too fuckin' late to be trying to read subtitles on the big screen.
    I came home and slept for 15 hours. How nasty is that? I had a bajillion nightmares and a killer headache when I woke up. I'm really getting sick of all these bad dreams. It makes me wake up in a bad mood, or even a sad mood. Last night I dreamed that my boyfriend was cheating on me, but refused to tell me about it. And of course I also dreamed about my mom. God, I miss her.
    I had breakfast/dinner with my dad and watched the 4th quarter - double overtime of the Alabama/Arkansas game. I love the fact that I'm not some ditzy girl who doesn't know what the hell is going on at a football game.
    Back in high school, I used to go to the Prep games, and there would be girls all over the place in their teeny tiny tank tops, nipping out because it was so cold, flipping their hair in my face, and clapping at god knows what. They were only there to meet guys. LAME. I met guys at the games, but I found no shame in wearing a comfortable jacket and understandning the plays.
    Creighton doesn't have a football team, but there's always the basketball team! And let me tell you, I know how to play basketball better than football. I used to play forward and damn was I good. :)

    Friday, September 26
    Sittin' on the dock of the bay,
    Watching the tide roll away

    I wish I was. It's been a pretty blah day and it's only 11. I cleaned Sean's kitchen last night. It was way disgusting because he's a bachelor and doesn't know any better. Now it's uber-clean and worthy of visitors.
    I left my half-eaten apple in the fridge because I was going to take a shower before school. But I got distracted by cleaning out my inbox and updating Untold Story's site.
    I wanted to buy a pumpkin and paint it for Lauren and Dana's dorm room, but they were $4 each! I'll wait until they get down to 25 cents per pound.
    I have some homework I could probably getting done. And There's probably still time to shower. Or maybe I should concentrate on cleaning my own room before someone else's. Or maybe I could go back to the sweet, warm slumber that I once enjoyed.
    Good news: my cold is almost gone. There's still a teeny tiny bit of congestion, and my aspirin is finally attacking the headaches. You see, when you get a sinus-ache as bad as mine, you can feel the outline of the throbbing across the apples of your cheeks, and the pressure causes toothaches and jawaches and you can't open your mouth all the way to eat which is actually okay because you're never in the mood to eat anyway. At least I can still drive okay.

    Realization: I am too fucking sweet. I so deserved that Good Samaritan award back in high school.

    Thursday, September 25
    Just when I thought it couldn't get any crazier...
    I was up all night last night because my friend Lauren had to be taken to the emergency room. Someone had accidentally drappoed a pocket knife and it sort of, well, landed on her leg. The entire thing was completely accidental, but Lauren's leg started bleeding so much that I had to get the emeregency medical people to come help. She's fine now. She has four stitches and will be okay in a couple of weeks. Afterwards, back in Lauren's dorm room, her roommate Dana had passed out due to stress, stress, dehydration, and more stress. The emergency medical people made yet a second trip to the room. Gah, it's too much! They're both going to be fine, I hope. I just feel so awful for both of them being injured in some way, shape or form.
    I woke up at 9:15 and walked over to my 9:30 anthropology test. I was a little late coming in because well, the campus is one big hill. And I always seem to be going uphill no matter where I go. The teacher gave me a look as I walked in late, but I slung out answers left and right. There were 10 essays, and I feel there were only two that could have been better, but were sufficient as they were. I ended up being the second one done, so I left early.
    When I came home, I was happy to hear that I didn't have to work until tomorrow. However my dad was pissed that I didn't call him last night and tell him where I was. If it happens again, I have to move out, he says. Yikes. I'd better get my act together before I am out of a place to live.

    Tuesday, September 23
    I sat down to write my paper and I got five IMs and then the fucking phone rang. I was all like, "Whoa!"
    I'm totally out of it because I've got these killer sinus headaches, worse than I can ever remember.
    My jeans are way baggier on me then when I first started college. Eating less and lots of walking pays off. Except now my pants fall down every two seconds and this pair doesn't have any belt loops. :(
    My thighs are covered in bruises because I have this unfortunate tendency to run into sharp corners.
    Everyone and his mother are hitting on me this week. Stop already! You guys aren't getting any.
    This evening as I was leaving campus, I stopped dead in my tracks. The beautiful sound of piano music lured me to the back of the Student Union. There, I met two guys playing various songs by Ben Folds Five (a favorite of mine), and they made me jealous that my parents never forced me to take piano lessons. They were sweet enough to play "Philosophy" for me. Ah, joy.
    Now I have to get started on my World Lit paper. It would be great if school got cancelled....forever.

    Quote of the Day
    Professor: Andy, why are you late for class?
    Andy: To be honest sir, I was having great sex with a really hot girl.
    Professor: Whoa! Too much information.
    Andy: Well, you asked.

    Damn it! Not three minutes later, and she starts up again. It would be cool if Lauren's name was really Maria, because then we could burst into song...
    How do you solve a problem like Lauren Maria?

    So I'm sitting in my friends' dorm room, and it's FINALLY silent. There are four of us lounging around trying to study. But slap-happy Lauren just won't shut up! She keeps laughing at God knows what, which makes the rest of us laugh, then all our attempts to study just go to shit. There's only fifteen minutes of "quiet time" left. I hope we can make it.

    I have a toothache and a jawache and a sinusache and an earache and a headache and all those rolled together make me want to KILL MYSELF.

    Such pain... :(

    Monday, September 22
    How did I become so unhappy so quickly?

    Gah, what a crappy ass night. I got five missed calls from Seth. He never calls me that often, so I think that it must be something important. I return his call two minutes later and he says he was bored and just wanted someone to talk to. Yeah, that's fine. So I try to keep up a conversation, but the guy is just not usual. Now he's distracted by playing on his computer. So now he doesn't want to talk to me...a mere two minutes later? "I found something better to do." Fuck that! This shit is so not helping me...

    Plus my dad is mad at me for smoking a few cigarettes. I'm 18. I'm not addicted. I felt crappy and it made me feel better.

    I just want to be left alone.

    Sunday, September 21

    I watched MST3K - Pod People and nearly pissed my pants from laughing. I'm getting myself into a bit of trouble. I think I'm starting to like a guy that I probably shouldn't like because one, I have a boyfriend whom I love very much, and two, I know he doesn't want to date me. However, I am really glad that we've become friends. It's rare that I bond with someone so quickly, and it's been a while since I've felt this good about life in general. Except for my "cold." I'm at the tail end and I'm getting sick of swigging DayQuil for breakfast.

    Saturday, September 20

    General asshats
    Circle I Limbo

    Oakland Raider Fans
    Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

    Inventor of the automated toilet
    Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

    DMV Employees
    Circle IV Rolling Weights

    Militant Vegans
    Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

    River Styx

    Circle VI Buried for Eternity

    River Phlegyas

    Lecherous pedophiles
    Circle VII Burning Sands

    Saddam Hussein
    Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

    Osama bin Laden
    Circle IX Frozen in Ice

    Design your own hell

    luminati3: *dumps a bucket of water over you*
    lisabee16: dude!
    lisabee16: what was that for?
    luminati3: extreem bordom
    lisabee16: chickenfucker
    luminati3: i'd rather be a woman fucker
    lisabee16: nope. pulling shit like that only gets you chickens
    luminati3: damn

    You know what?? Raymi and anti have a zillion readers and i have maybe two. I installed a new feature that tells me how many people are coming to my site and from where. THEREFORE, you guys need to link me and then tell people to visit my site because I feel downright unloved when nobody gives a shit.

    ALSO, I noticed that Blogger installed spell check for its bloggers. So fuckin' use it already!

    P.S. I am going to hell, but I can't tell you why. At least, not here.

    Thursday, September 18
    The paomnnehil pweor of the hmuan mnid

    Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.

    The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm.

    Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

    amzanig huh?

    woke up this morning feelin like shit
    no surprise in that. my chest's a pit
    coughin and heavin, i feel like a heathen
    weezin, damn i just don't believe this
    it was s'posed to be the home stretch
    fuck i'm still sick, so what's the catch?
    got a class in an hour, ain't no time to shower
    now where do i find some brain power?
    down the whole pharmacy choke on my meds
    i just wanna get my ass back into bed
    but i gotta go to school, man this ain't cool
    fool, i'll be lying dead in a pool
    (if i'm lucky)

    Expanding my horizons. Yeah, that's it.
    Last night I enjoyed a wonderful little performance by Ronald Radford, nationally acclaimed flamenco guitarist. I would have liked to have stayed for the whole thing, but my journalism teacher required a typed review by 9 pm.
    Tonight I went to a meeting for the school's literary magazine, Shadows. We discussed the submitted pieces, deciding what should go in and what should stay out. In all my years of writing classes had I never seen poetry disected in such a way as I witnessed tonight. It was enlightening.

    My dad left me an instant message saying "You'd better not be smoking cigarettes."
    I tried smoking a cigarette once. It made me feel like I was going to throw up.
    Even so, it's a bit hypocritic. He has smoked for the majority of his life....still does. And even though everyone and their mother forgot, I did turn 18 a few months ago. Meh.

    Wednesday, September 17
    Bite my lip and close my eyes; Take me away to paradise.

    A cigarette after two days of not smoking is like a double decker taco after a night a misadventures. Unfortunately the buzz left me wandering up and down the parking lot in search of my car, which I passed three times. Driving home, I was listening to Snoop Dogg on the radio. He always uses acronyms and spells words out. Man, I'm too tired to be trying to figure that shit out. I had a long, hard day, and I just want to get into my groove. My groove was disrupted by an SUV riding my tail with his brights in my eyes. To add to it, I was being blinded from the front by a flashing electronic billboard bright enough to stroblelight a two-mile radius. Shit, man.

    Seth makes me mad sometimes. He's acting selfish and lame by saying he doesn't have time to talk to me anymore...not even for 15 minutes! I mean, sure it's UN-lame that he is trying to move out here for me, but why can't he also make time for me now? I am his girlfriend, aren't I? Anyway, I hung up the phone and let him have his time to himself. He'll miss me sooner or later.

    Sunday, September 14
    I've been missing out on the midnight movies lately. I guess that's what happens when you find better things to do. Anyway, you guys can't let me miss the next three weeks. They are my favorite movies.

    So I took a couple friends from school with me to Gecko's party. My friend Lauren got hit on not only by Gecko, but by a lesbian as well. AND she just got asked to homecoming by our friend, Chris. Fuck! Who's gonna show me the love? I guess it didn't help that I put on too much makeup. And I think it's time for me to quit spending my cash on meals and head over to GNC for some magic weight-loss pills. Ephedra-free, of course. I can be stupid at times, but I try to watch out.
    I saw Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for the first time, and I think I will be adding it to my mental collection of favorite movies.
    Last night I also dreamed that I went ice skating in flip flops with a beer in my hand. Dude, it's so fun.

    P.S. Somebody leave some comments. I could use the company.

    Saturday, September 13
    Let Them Have Cake

    A bar one night, a concert the next, and a party tonight. Whoo, my weekend has been exhausting.
    The Cake concert was fuckin' awesome, and I fell in crushes with The Hackensaw Boys. Cute men with very strong hands. The evening went great until the ugliest drunk girl I've ever seen pushed her way up in front of me and elbowed me and crunched her heel into my toes. Bitchy ass motherfucking whore slut. God damn, she was ugly!
    Check this: Last night I odered an extra large pizza for $7.99 plus free delivery. Tonight we got a large pizza for $19.47. I'm so glad I didn't pay for that one.
    Oh yeah, the party belongs to former River DJ, Sean Gecko. Yay for me and my connections.

    Says Adam

    The Origin of the Middle Finger:
    When crossbows were still the popular weapons of war, it took the middle finger to operate it properly. So a threat was made against the British to cut off their middle fingers. In defiance, the Brits would raise that particular finger, to show that their trigger fingers were in perfect working order. Now you know.

    Friday, September 12
    If you were to sneak into my house while I was home alone, and peek through the crack of my bedroom door, you may just hear me vocalizing along with the great Ella Fitzgerald. She's an alto's best friend. You may also spy me catching a few extra Z's after coming home at 8 in the morning from last night's adventure. We went to some dance bar in Fremont, and believe me, it had been ages since I really went out and partied. I'd have to say it was the first time I ever really felt comfortable grinding in public. No worries though, I keep it clean. But I was brave enough to dance like a dork and introduce myself to strangers because fuck, that's what they are. Strangers. What do I care what they think about me? Chances are I'll never see them again, so I say drop your worries and let the good times roll.

    Thursday, September 11
    Over the river and through the woods...
    We find ourselves in a special little town known as Hickville, Appalachia. Home of Simpson's star, Cletus, the slack-jawed yokel, Hickville stands loud and proud; for this is where you can find rock 'n' roll and the Church of God around every corner. Imagine the cast of Coal Miner's Daughter gathering together in the least run-down shack in the county, hoppin' and clappin' away to the sounds of the orginial rock and roll music. For a sample of this music, pop in your ever-favorite Amelie dvd, and fast forward to the scene in which she mails the first videotape to the Glass Man.
    Along with dancing in the Church of God, they also perform many other acts of faith. The Church of God is a faith that interprets the Bible literally, so when the Bible says (in so many words), "Ye shall dance with joy, take up serpents and flame, and drink poisons in celebration. For he who has faith in the Lord shall not be harmed," our furry little friends do it! They dance in celebration! They preach fire and brimstone. They hold their hands over flames for minutes at a time. They handle dangerous snakes and down shots of various poisons. And many of them do survive, no harm done. But what about those that don't?
    One girl was bitten by the snakes while zoning out in worship. Since Hickville residents don't believe in doctors, this girl passed away like nobody's business. The town's response: "It was God's will." "She proclaimed false faith!" "Meh, whatever."
    I forgot what I was going to say next, but go look them up. They're a fascinating bunch.

    Wednesday, September 10
    Clubs I Joined Today:
    Student Art League
    Environmental Science Club
    Shadows (Literary Magazine)
    JayWalk Marathon
    Creighton Students Union (Government)
    Gay Straight Alliance
    The Alliance Francaise Groupe d'Omaha (French Club)

    Alright. So I'm a fucking idiot. I wear a sweater in humidity. I go hang out with strangers from Cali. I don't do my homework and I spend too much money. I scrapped my nonchalant attitude to make myself look cool, when ironically, it is that very nonchalance that made me cool. I dunno. It's been a crazy week. I've been fighint with my boyfriend. I popped some sort of blood vessel in my arm, and now it looks like I've been shooting up. Blah, I don't wanna write right now.

    Tuesday, September 9
    It's raining outside and I left my jacket at home. My books got wet as I walked from class to class. I'm in the library for the first time, and it's not half bad. I like being able to access a computer when I'm on campus (since I don't get to have a fancy laptop in my non-existant dorm room). I noticed people looking over because I tend to type so quickly. I don't even type the proper way. I think I just get a lot of practice when blogging and chatting online.
    I hear the Jeopardy theme playing in the background... Odd.
    I scared myself shitless last night. I felt as if I was going to die. I'm such a fuckup sometimes.

    Monday, September 8
    Fuckin' school.
    I eat once in a while.
    I sleep when I can.
    I smoke a cigarette when I feel like it.
    I almost never get a shower.
    I feel like fuckin' shit.
    No wonder I'm gonna die from taking too many supplements.

    Sunday, September 7
    Why is Seth a dork? He hung up with me to order a pizza from the hot chick at Papa John's. Why hang up with one hot chick, whom you love, to talk to another, a complete stranger?

    Quote of the Night
    Seth: "How's your dad doing?"
    Me: "Oh, he's okay. He's a little tired though, because he was up late last night working at the Sausage Fest."

    Says Jessica

    I am so sick of people going around saying that the straight white male is the new minority. COME THE FUCK ON, PEOPLE!! It's certainly true that we see and label the SWMs as a majority, and we are always "accusing" them of taking everything from us. News flash: The average middle class woman makes 72 cents for every dollar that a male of the same statistics with the same training makes. Who was behind the whips and ran the plantations during the time of slavery? Not any "minority", that's for damn sure. What are the stats of every single president we've ever had? White male. Who got voting rights first? Not blacks, Asians, Native Americans, women, or gays. So I ask of you, why can't you just feel happy and blessed that you were born so privilaged? Why must you take your good status and use it against everyone? Go on and say that you're a minority because you don't have your own parade or holiday celebrating you guys, but what you don't understand is that minorities have to have stuff like that -- so that all the people discriminating against them have the chance to see them out and proud (pardon the pun). Be thankful that you don't need a parade or a protest or a picketline or a holiday to get what you want. You've already got it. That goes for you, Brandon. Joe too. Actually, this rant was pretty much for them. Ha.

    Saturday, September 6

    1. First Name: Elizabeth
    2. Middle Name: Ashley
    3. Last Name: Bloomingdale
    4. Nicknames: Lisa, Lisabee, Blooms, Hey You, Off-Campus, The Girl With The Car
    5. City: Omaha, NE
    6. Age: Currently 18
    7. Guy or Gal: Chickadee
    8. Zodiac Sign: Leo – Always the center of attention
    9. Siblings: One little pain in my butt - Ricky
    11. Pet(s): Casper the Friendly Cat
    12. Hair Color: naturally – I dunno, currently - Auburnish
    13. Eye Color: a sparkly blue/gray (enchanting)
    14. Height: 5'6” I think, but I always feel really short
    15. What hand do you write with? The one that’s attached to my arm (right)
    16. Hair Length: barely touching my shoulders, but I’m getting it cut on Saturday
    17. Do you bite your nails? When they’re already broken
    19. Do others think you're cute: Yeah, sometimes.
    20. Shoe Size: anywhere from 9-10; it depends on the shoe

    21a. Do you have a Girlfriend? Not at the moment
    21b. Do I have a boyfriend? Yes sir, I do
    22. If so what is their name? Seth <3
    23. Are you gay? I thought so once, but I don’t think I really am

    26. Where do you shop the most? Duh - Bloomingdale's! (actually I've never been there). I shop wherever they have stuff I need
    27. Do you think your fashion is cool? What constitutes cool? I wear what’s comfy.
    28. Do you have any piercings? Doubles in the ears – maybe my tongue someday
    30. Do you have a tattoo? Nah, too permanent

    31. Do you do drugs? On occasion
    32. Do you drink? See above
    35. What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use? Garnier Fructis was on sale
    36. What sport(s) do you play? I don’t play on any teams, but I love all sports
    37. What are you most scared of? Being alone and unprepared
    38. If you could go anywhere, where would it be? Los Angeles...again
    39. Favorite Sports team: Creighton Bluejays
    40. What are you listening to right now? Silence
    42. What time is it? 1:47 in the afternoon
    43. Do you have your own phone line? Just a cell phone
    44. What are the last four digits of your phone number? 4981
    46. What shoes do you wear? Flip to the Flizzops
    47. What clothes do you sleep in? I don’t
    48. What kind of car do you have? ’91 Pontiac Grand AM – but I don’t really “have” it, I just use it.
    49. Who is the last person who called you? Seth, to tell me about his garage sale
    50. Where do you want to get married? Doesn’t matter
    53. If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be? Um, my inability to make good decisions….and of course to have better physical health
    54. Who do you really hate? No one. I get annoyed, but not hateful.
    55. What are the ugliest names? Who gives a shit? Judgmental bastards.

    56. Color: Black and White and Red and Khaki and Green and Blue
    57. Number: Uh, two?
    58. Movies: Office Space, Amelie, The Burbs, Bad Boys II, um… There’s too many.
    61. Brand: 3M Scotch
    62. TV show: Simpsons, King of the Hill, Cosby Show, Premium Blend
    63. Food: Yogurt, tacos, satay, sushi, sandwiches, health crap
    64. Fast food restaurant? I try to avoid fast food, but I like a bunch – Taco John’s and Quizno’s come to mind
    65. Nail polish color: Clear or neon
    69. Good Number? Yes sir, it is
    74. Scent: Jasmine, Coconut, Ginger, Amber, *men’s cologne*
    75. Bath or Shower: Shower – I don’t soak in my own filth
    76. Teacher: Dr. Kuhlman, baby! Yeah!
    77. Game: Catch Phrase, Trivial Pursuit, Mortal Combat
    78. Book: Uh…too many to name

    81. Smoked? Yeah – it sucked ass
    82. Drank? Yes
    83. Got drunk? A few times
    84. Bungee Jumped? Nope
    85. Went movie hopping? Honestly, no
    86. Broke the law? Many times
    87. Ran from the cops? Uh, sort of...more like drove away
    91. Tried to kill yourself? Tried? No. Thought about it? Of course.
    92. Made yourself throw up? Tried to – Didn’t work
    93. There is no 93
    94. Been In Love? Yes sir, I have…and still am
    95. Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? I think so….when I was younger

    96. Red: Bright
    97. Cow: Fat
    98. Pig: Yum
    99. Rubber: Ball

    100-102. I guess there’s no 100, 101, or 102 either
    103. Barfing on your date or date barfing on you? Barfing on my date. Make him clean the shit up.
    104. Have your tonsils or your appendix removed? Tonsils – been there, done that

    105. Coolest: Tim and Bryan
    106. Weirdest: Candi
    108. Smartest: Me, duh…. Um, Kathy and Maria are pretty smart
    109. Happiest: Typh and Melanie
    110. Meanest: David, but I don't think he tried to be
    111. Sweetest: Lauren
    112. Loudest: Stephanie
    113. Quietest: Lan Anh
    114. Silliest: Colin
    117. Who do you go to for advice: Seth and Colin and Candice
    118. Who knows ALL your secrets? Seth knows the most.

    119. Steve: Maher
    120. Lindsay: Brian’s ex-girlfriend…. God, he’s cute.
    121. Jeremy: London (also a stud)
    122. Missy: Elliott Work it!
    123. David: Healy
    124. Pat: Patty Cake
    125. Roxette: 80’s music and cassette tapes

    126. Eaten an entire pack of KD? It’s possible. I don’t know what KD stands for. Fucking acronyms.
    127. Caused a car accident? Um…yeah
    128. Seen the ocean: Yes sir. The Atlantic and the Pacific

    129. Night or Day: Night
    130. Chocolate Chip or Mint Chocolate Chip: both are yucky
    131. Ocean or lake: Ocean
    132. Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla
    133. Lion or Tiger: Tiger – the zoo is so cool
    134. Love or lust: Lovey dovey
    135. Silver or gold: Silver
    136. Pencil or pen: BIC® Mechanicals
    137. Skirt or jeans: Jeans
    138. Rose or tulip: Tulip

    139. Cried: No, but I whined...and complained...and cursed
    140. Bought Something: Yeah
    141. Worn a skirt: No
    142. Gone for a walk: More like a hike – Creighton’s campus is all hills
    143. Gone for a drive: Oh yes
    144. Gone out for dinner: Um, sort of
    145. Taken a test: a test of morals
    146. Talked to an ex: Yes, he’s such a fucker
    147. Missed an ex: no comment
    148. Watched your favorite movie: No, but I watched a new one – Out Cold
    149. Given someone a present: Yes, I love to give
    150. Missed someone: Constantly
    151. Hugged someone: Yeah
    152. Kissed someone: Sadly, no
    153. Danced with someone: Um…I ran up and down the halls in a funky manner
    154. Had a nightmare: See #150
    155. Fought with your parents? No, but I got some dirty looks.

    156. What do you feel about the Ouija board? I never got to try it because my mom was superstitious and wouldn’t let me near one. I’d try it if I had a chance though. Call me Brave McBraverson
    157. Do you believe in yourself? Sometimes
    158. Worst feeling in the world: Regret
    159. Best feeling in the world: Staring at the person you love
    160. World peace: It’s a nice thought – Go read Orwell’s “Animal Farm”
    161. Are you a health freak: I wish – I’m out of shape
    162. Do you have a crush on anyone: Yes sir, I do
    163. Who is your crush? Mmm, that’s a secret :)

    164. Do you like filling these out? Usually – I try to be honest, so it takes time to think
    165. How many people are you sending this to? No one. I don’t forward crap mail.
    166. Who was the person who sent this to you? Amanda Pignotti
    167. What do you think of the person that sent this to you? She’s pretty awesome, though I don’t know her as well as I probably should. Great soccer player, a little closed-minded, very loud and funny
    168: Who will send it back? I dunno – I’m not sure anyone even reads my site anymore

    Thursday, September 4
    Blah tee dah. Once again I give my opinion, unwanted as it may be, and I get myself into trouble. Tonight's rerun: "Getting a large group of people to hate me." Popcorn and soda available at the concession stand.

    Yo, yo! Check this out:

    Drivin' home on the freaky deaky freeway
    Givin' myself wicka wet willies
    I glanced to da left
    And I looked to da right
    I whipped out mah cell phone
    Lookin' fo' a fight
    Holla at Peabody
    He ain't got nobody
    To back his ass up
    Goin' be a dead body

    Stay tuned for verse two...

    Dear Everyone Listed in Tina's Links,

    There is more to life than lame-ass, local "punk rock" shows. And lame-ass, local "emo" concerts. There is more to life than black and red clothing from Hot Topic and light blue flip-flops from Pac-Sun. There is more to life than short black hair and dark eyeliner and dirty All*Stars made in Indonesian sweatshops. If you're going to go to church, do it because you believe in the shit, not because all your friends are there. Some of you don't even act like the Christians you proclaim yourselves to be, gossiping and bad-mouthing everyone else (including you friends) behind their backs. ....fuckers..... If you're going to go to school, try learning something instead of spending every waking minute trying to impress others. How impressive can you be when you walk, talk, dress and act the exact same way as everyone else? Quit going to coffee shops and ordering something so full of sugar that you can't even taste your three-dollar shot of espresso. Quit gouging your eyes out so that you are forced to buy prescription glasses just so you can wear black-rimmed "emo" glasses. Stop using melodramatic lyrics to describe your meaningless existence as a clone-in-training. Ugh, it's so pathetic.
    You guys like, totally don't rock my socks off anymore. Dude, you know what is like, awesome? I stopped hanging out with you and decided that like, being real and true to myself was far more entertaining than standing still at a concert, pretending to care about the music, when I'm really just looking around to see who notices how many band patches I've safety-pinned to my corduory Dickies purse.
    What kind of pleasure can you gain out of life when all you do is go to concerts every weekend or dream about going to concerts every night? Where's the fun and adventure in doing the same old thing every day? Try living life outside of your stereotypical wannabe bubble and explore the things around you. There's more to do in this city than you think; you've just got to go out and find it. And for God's sake (as if you really even believe in him - how many of you guys actually pray?), if you're all going to keep your trendy Xanga Blogs, at least use some proper grammar so that someone from the outside world can figure out what the hell you're talking about.

    Tuesday, September 2
    Tuesday is my busiest day, and this is why...
  • 9:30 - 10:45 am -- Human Variation
  • 11:30 - 12:20 pm -- Freshman Seminar
  • 1:15 - 5:00 pm -- Work at Torrey Pines
  • 6:00 - 9:00 pm -- News Reporting

    When will I eat lunch? When will I eat dinner? Some of you may respond, "During those time gaps between work and school." Ha! You fools! Do you not understand that it takes an immense amount of time to get from work to school and vice versa. It is at least a 30-minute drive when I am speeding along at 75 mph during normal traffic. Rush hour + recent crackdowns on highway speeding = me being late for EVERYTHING. Plus, no time for food. Although...the school's convenient store does sell a tasty Sobe Bar thingamabob for a whoppin' $1.75. And they wonder why college kids are so poor? Gas and food and food and gas and maybe a new pair of shoes once winter hits....

  • Monday, September 1
    despite what my away message says, i'm not really working on anthropology homework i spent the day sleeping because the weekends are my chance to play catch-up i tend to stay really busy which means no time for old friends and i'm sorry if that upsets you guys but i really would just sort of like to move on with my life i get sick of doing the same old same old and so i would appreciate it if you would take a hint and stop calling me every frickin' day i'm sorry i'm upset because i went to get some ice cream late at night and my dad semi-scolded me which is fine because i didn't really need the ice cream and i probably didn't need that homemade guacamole dip last night so instead i think i will sit in my room all night and have a drink and maybe study some anthropology there is a bonus assignment that i forgot to do i wish seth would call me i wish he was here and that maybe sometimes he would be more romantic i miss him a lot and he says he hates it out there in los angeles so i asked him to move here and maybe we could live together and i'm not sure if he will hopefully he will but it would be quite some time before that would happen and i miss him NOW candice wrote a really cool entry about squashing a bug and every time i read someone else's blog i realize that i am not completely satisfied with the way my life is going but if you were to sit down and count my "blessings" you would see that i have A LOT and guess i'm just ungrateful sometimesand jealous sometimes and i feel like puking but maybe i just really need that drink...

    Do you ever get the urge to really trash talk someone? Or many someone's? Alas, I will resist the urge. Not that these people would ever know. And I could care less what they think because they're all just terribly fake. And before I get any further into it, I should go...


    Labor Day Weekend: Part 2

    Meh. I just felt like typing this morning. Last night was the annual Gook Tournament at Grandma's house....
    Gook = card game similar to competitive solitaire. This year they went all out and created a trophy for the winner. My cousin Rachel was deemed "World Gook Master" and winner of the coveted Jack of Hearts Trophy. Yeah, we're a dorky family. I decided to crash there even though I was perfectly okay to drive by the end of the night. I took the couch in the living room, which meant I also, unknowingly, took the chiming clock. Every hour on the hour I could hear church bells in my dreams. In my dreamworld, the fancy chime clock looked like one of those wooden bowling pin people that stack inside of each other...and it turned its head and talked to me! Very creepy.

    Today is Labor Day and how am I going to celebrate? By doing some labor! My room is a neverending mess and today is installment #258,134,563 of project "Clean My Room." It'll never get done.

    Sunday, August 31
    Last night was Jay Jam and it rocked! Well, some of it did. I took Gina with me to the carnival on the mall. Instead of playing various carnival games to win little bouncy balls and yo-yo's, I stood in line for over an hour to get a wax hand. It's so cool! I also got my free ticket to the CAKE CONCERT at Fallapalooza on the 12th. I'm very excited. After the carnival we joined some of the dormies (my new term for people who live in dorms) at the Foam Party. As I danced with my friends, we were showered with foam and bubbles until it went up over our heads. It's kinda scary because you can't see anything and it's hard to breathe. But I loved it anyway.

    Gina started up a band called Untold Story, so of course I made the band site for her. It's still in the making, but I think it looks pretty cool so far. I haven't heard their music yet, so I can't really recommend it. But I do like the lyrics to Your Mom.

    Tonight is Gook Night, the annual card tournament at my grandma's house. Gook (besides being a derrogatory term) is one of my favorite card games. It's pretty much like playing competitive solitaire. But you do it in teams. Against other teams. And there's chili cheese dip. And beer. And swearing. Lots of swearing. And of course CCR. It makes for the perfect soundtrack.

    More later...

    Saturday, August 30
    Me: Grr!! I am woman! Hear me roar! Argh!!! I'm going to kill whomever invented cramps. I'm coming after YOU! *rooooaaaarrrr*
    You: You're not very threatening while lying there curled up in the fetal position.
    Me: Ooohhh, the pain!!! :(

    I've lost the will to live.

    Labor Day Weekend: Part One

    My aunt sent me this email last night...

    IMPORTANT!!!! Send this warning to everyone on your e-mail list.
    I hate those hoax e-mail warnings, but this one is important. If a man comes to your front door, and says he is conducting a survey, and asks you to show him your boobs, DO NOT show him your boobs! I repeat...
    This is a scam; he only wants to see your boobs!!!

    Last night was the first men's soccer game of the year, and it was fuckin' awesome! Well, at least the first half was. I left after that. Oh, and there was a tailgate party beforehand. If you were going to a barbeque, wouldn't you expect them to serve hamburgers and hot dogs? Yeah, me too. But how wrong I was. These hamburgers looked pretty weird, which was fine because I don't eat burgers anyway. So my hot dog... It was a big fat gray-ish bratwurst. Gah, so gross! I'd much rather eat a hot dog with god knows what's in it than a stinky sausage. I think I was scarred for life from some Chevy Chase movie from my childhood where they ate terrifying German food.

    Three days into the school year and I've already gone to my first college party. And it was good times. But it's pretty obvious that I couldn't drink because living off-campus means I have to drive home at the end of the evening. Which is fine. I don't feel like getting arrested just yet. It was pretty nasty to see people falling over left and right. And that poor elevator in Gallagher Hall... Let's just say that I could tell what the last person to use it had for dinner.
    I came home at a reasonable time, and I went to sleep at my normal bed time. I tell you this because today was the first time I ever had to call in sick, and my dad thinks it was because I was out late last night. However, I was up on time this morning... Feeling totally sick to my stomach because periods suck major. Oy, I can barely stand to sit here and type out my blog entry. Men, take advantage of your stinky selves because being a girl simply means cramps galore.

    Why else is my dad pissed off? Because of me... Again. Note: Just last week we replaced the alternator in my car when it broke down. Then why is it that as I was driving home last night, the battery light went on again? He does this "sigh of disappointment" thing that makes me feel more awful than if I had killed someone's puppy. It's not my fault the car is a piece of shit. I'd be willing to pay to have it looked at by a professional to find out what the hell is wrong with it. Grr. What a crappy day to top off such a fabulous night before.

    Thursday, August 28
    More sushi for me! It's becoming a favorite of mine. As is this dental job. Today was the second craziest day I've had since I started working there. First of all, the electrician blew a fuse in our processor, so we had to resort to emergency manual film developing for our emergency patient. How ironic. At the same time, we had to call in the technician for the processor, three patients came in simultaneously, two of whom had mistaken what day it was (i.e. not their appointment day), and the phone would not stop ringing. And to top it all off, I think my last patient was a transgender. I swear to whatever deity you believe in this woman used to be a man! I'm totally accepting of the entire lifestyle and whatnot, but you can't hate me for being curious about it. She even asked us if we wanted to see a picture of her from her past life....*awkward pauses and glances*.....only to find out she had gotten her picture taken in a ragtime/old west theme. Oy, it was just a weird day in general.
    Written during my human variation class today:
    "I walked half a full-on humidity...after driving halfway across rush hour traffic...for a measly 75 minute class...and then I have to walk another half a mile back to my the dead heat...and drive halfway across go back to work...for the rest of the day...Blah."

    P.S. Try eating raw ginger. It's yummy.

    Wednesday, August 27
    Too Soon for Sake

    My nerves about the first day of school were calmed down last night when Mina treated me to sushi after work. The restaurant was almost too contemporary to be located in Omaha. But the food was to die for, and I plan on going back again. I asked Mina about sake. Thinking it was some sort of tea, I was looking forward to trying it. But she equated it to isopropol alcohol. That means it tastes nasty like straight gin or vodka. I guess I'm not quite old enough to try that one.
    Waking up this morning I ran into all of the typical "first day of school" blunders. I overslept, I had a bad hairday, I almost forgot my books, etc. I had to work in the morning before class, which forced me to eat lunch in the car on the way to Creighton. It wasn't so bad though. I had a big dinner to make up for it.
    School wasn't too awful either. Despite my long, uphill hike from the parking lot in 100-degree weather, I made it to class with time to spare. My World Lit class is a basic repeat of AP Brit Lit, but without all the crazy antics. My theology class is going to be somewhat of a bore. The teacher talks quietly, which doesn't mesh well with my bad hearing. And ex-boyfriend Healy sits behind me and over a seat. I can tolerate him when he's not being a dipshit. He's very moody. For instance, the other day I was sitting in the student union and he approached me for the first time in months. We had small talk, "what's your major?" type stuff. By the end of the conversation he had given me his cell number and invited himself to the midnight movie with me this weekend. Smart as I am I invited Candi this afternoon, because as usual, David backed out. He's just so weird sometimes.
    Anyway, I think my favorite class so far will be my world politics class. The teacher is funny and straightforward and a major proponent of travel and international relations. I love to travel. I have friends from foreign countries. This class will force me to start reading the paper (which I need to do anyway if I want to be a journalism student), and it will hopefully help me fine-tune my critical thinking skills. I'm a math and science person. Give me a formula and I can solve the equation. I'm much better at memorizing than analyzing. However, I need to be good at both, and here's my opportunity to achieve that.

    Monday, August 25
    Oh So Dreamy

    It's time for Hot or Not Suitor of the Day! Here is Mr. Hunka Hunka Burnin' Love himself. Is he a dreamboat or what?

    Sunday, August 24
    Somebody comment for the love of Pete and his pet camel.

    Has anyone seen my shoes? They're black Chuck Taylor All*Stars with flames drawn on the tops and on the laces. They're basically the closest thing I have to a tennis shoe and I sooo need them right now. Please call me if you find them!

    Saturday, August 23
    I hate it when people give me the hint that something is wrong, but then they refuse to tell me what it is. Or they say to wait until later. Then I drive home all in a frenzy because I tend to worry about those types of things and all sorts of worst-case scenarios pop into my head and I could probably get into a car accident for not concentrating properly which would definitely ruin the good mood that I was in prior to the hint of bad news. And ironically enough, he wouldn't tell me what was wrong because he didn't want to ruin my "good mood." I wasn't even in a good mood. I was just coming out of a meeting and heading home. I was even in a slightly bad mood because I found out that many of my classes start between 10am and 2pm which means NO PARKING ANYWHERE. The good mood he heard was actually hundreds of college students cheering for a screening of "The Fast and the Furious" in the background.
    Other than that, the first day of Welcome Week at Creighton went pretty well. I think I'll like it here.

    Meet Joe Chemo, a camel who wishes he'd never smoked cigarettes. Joe is having trouble feeling COOL these days, now that he's lost most of his hair. Worst of all, Joe just realized that he's been MaNiPuLaTeD all his life by tobacco companies. Poor guy -- his tobacco IQ never was very high.


    I like to drink coffee.
    Except it makes me go poo.
    That's not something I like to do.
    I spotted someone's curly pubic hair
    On the bathroom floor.
    I threw it out and ran away.
    I hope I don't find any more.
    I am home alone.
    And I stared at the phone.
    I would like to live on my own.
    And I would get some new friends.
    Ones that don't really follow trends.
    Older ones that like to drink
    And don't try too hard to think
    About how they are just burnouts.
    What an ambition - to be a lout.
    I would like to just be lazy all day.
    And do nothing and everything
    In the coolest possible way.
    I would like to sit and relax
    And smoke a little pot.
    But I will probably get caught.
    Is my blog hot or not? (<-- insert link here later)

    Installment #2

    When most people answer the phone, they expect the caller to be some form of human. They generally do not anticipate a large stinging insect. I base this assumption on the fact that all of my phone conversations have been with other humans, except for the six times I prank-called Moviefone.

    But last week I was rang, nay, victimized, by one of the wasps that recently made their home in my house's outdoor atrium. The conversation went like this:

    Me: Hello?
    Wasp (to the other wasps): Okay, okay, shut up you guys!
    Me: Who is this?
    Wasp: Then you better go catch it!
    Me: What?
    Wasp: Wait, no, is your refrigerator running?
    Me: Um...
    Wasp: We will sting your eyeballs!
    Me: *CLICK*

    Yes, wasps are profoundly stupid creatures (although they had apparently managed to find and operate Ryan Christie's cell phone). In fact, today, any given wasp's intellectual prowess would barely surpass that of a California high school graduate.

    But if wasps could so much as grasp the concept of "door," humanity would have concerns far greater than catching our refrigerators. Rather than continously ambling about their nests, wasps would simply park their stingers above every front door in temperate climates, and wait patiently. If we humans were dumb enough ever to leave our shelter, POW! Then we would all cry.

    If wasps got any smarter than that, they wouldn't even need to sting us. They would obtain F-16s armed with air to surface tactical nukes. And still, undoubtedly, some nature-loving idiot would direct us to "STAND STILL!" when confronted by jet-propelled wasps. Stupidity is not restricted to insects.

    Wasps don't die when they use their stingers, so they will sting anything. Animals. Plants. Cars. Small piles of soot. They just don't give a damn. Last week, I could have entered the atrium wearing a seamless bulletproof beekeeper suit, and the wasps would have attacked anyway, thinking, "HA! That is a seamless bulletproof BEEkeeper suit, not a specialized seamless bulletproof WASPkeeper suit! Now, Dan will die."

    They want to kill me, but even if they didn't -- even if wasps were law abiding, upstanding citizens, I still could not respect them. Because they don't DO anything! Take bees. Bees make honey. Everyone knows this. Also, they look for pollen. Graduates of high schools outside California know that. And bees are on our side, too. They usually will not even think to sting you unless you provoke them by shooting air rifles at their hive, swatting at them, standing still, etc.

    While the bees have legitimate insect careers going, the wasps hang around their nests and smoke copious amounts of marijuana all day long. This is why they make nests to begin with: The nests are crude, primitve bongs. On Saturday, I even caught a wasp puffing on a small joint at the Metallica concert. Okay, no, but I did see Quentin Tarantino, sans entourage, in my region of the pit. Who knew he was a metalhead? Anyway, he's probably dead now.

    And so are the wasps at my house. It was when they started loitering on our sliding screen doors that my roommates and I decided they would need to die immediately. (You simply cannot look at a creature that ugly and ignore the problem.) That night, after extensive internet research and consulting the wisdom of several authority figures, we developed the cunning tactic of poking the nests with a stick. How this was supposed to kill the wasps, I do not know.

    The next morning, the wasps from the particular nest we brought down began rebuilding. By the time I was awake (suffice it to say that it was no longer morning), they had erected a full blown wasp city, complete with suburbs, right there in our atrium. They did it for spite, I'm sure. You could smell the ganja from the front yard.

    We had been hesitant to use Raid because we were fairly certain the wasps would just get high off of it. But, because upside-down skyscrapers were now being constructed in our house, we had to cave in and try it. When the spray contacted the wasps, they sort of froze for a second, as if to say, "Well then, fuck you too." Then they plummeted to the ground in that satisfying way only the bane of your existence can.

    So, now that the wasps are out of the way, I can finally ask some burning questions. First, just what the heck is an atrium? Also, where can I sell several crude bongs?

    Furthermore, have I ever starred in a feature film? Answer: yes. "Clueless." Click.

    ~ Goose

    Installment #1

    Because I think everyone else's blogs are so much more interesting than mine, I'm going to relay some of my favorite entries. Enjoy.

    operation rip off my dad.

    it was during the period of time when he FIRST disowned me, and told me to never talk to him or "come around" his house ever again. i sat at home, and thought to myself: this fucker is gonna PAY...

    but things didn't go quite as planned...

    the plan was to break in through an open/unlocked window, dressed in solid black, swipe his stash of pot, gaffle his pile of cash, and rip off his VCR. oh and to not get caught, cuz he might whip out a gun and kill me, or beat me up, or something...

    so i broke in with ease. it felt wierd to be in there as an intruder, but i got over it. and proceeded to the 3rd floor where he sleeps and where he keeps a pile of money on some dresser, usually about 1-2 thousand bucks in cash. i remember hearing him snore as i stood there in shock... the shock of finding that he didn't put his money there that night. whatta an asshole, eh?

    so i headed down to the kitchen to find his weed. i found an ounce, and five bucks cash. things seemed back on track, so i headed to the family room where i broke in so i could grab the VCR and hit the fucking road.

    but even that was a pain in the ass. he was a rich dude, so he had a gang of electronic thing-thangs plugged into shit all over the place. it was a spider web of cords and wires. i literally had to unplug EVERYthing before the VCR would come loose. but it finally did and i headed for my escape window.

    as i busted out undetected i ran my ass of back to my car, i didn't want to be seen, because i looked as suspicious as a guy with an uzi in 7-11. solid black clothes and a VCR under my arm. "yeah officer, i was just taking the VCR for a late night stroll."

    but when i got home, the weed was gone. it must have fallen out when i was running. so my "big score" was five bucks and a used VCR. how fucking retarded.

    to this day i wonder if he ever had any idea it was me. not that i care. he's a selfish prick anyways...

    ~ Anti

    Even on a Saturday they do not let me sleep in. Am I that goodlooking? Surely not.
    Creighton has requested my attendance to their "Welcome Week" activities, which in short, are a basic rerun of last month's Summer Preview program. So help me God, if they ask me to do another runaround scavenger hunt in 100-degree weather, someone will have hell to pay. They're even making me pay for the food! What kind of social gathering doesn't offer free food?
    Argh. And I have to go meet new people. Yes, I've stated before that "I love to meet new people and try new things, etc." But when they attack me at desginated meet-n-greet times in mass form, it is not so pleasant. Students used to complain that "at the larger universities, I'm just a number. Here, I'm a person." Cue cheesy smile and commercial music. Having come from a high school of less than 400 girls, and knowing almost all 400 of them at one point, I decided that I would just like to be a number in the ranks. An extra in the award-winning drama that is college. Let me sink into the hull and dream of a magical place far off in the clouds where no one can reach me... Where I can dream of sex, drugs, and rock and roll; and I can catch up on my goddamn sleep.

    I noticed that I'm always wishing I was older than I actually am. I'm never satisfied with my peer group. Some of my coolest friends are in their mid- to late-twenties. I flirt with older men. I work with middle-aged women. Sad to say, I cannot go join them for drinks. Why oh why must I be cursed with such a belated birthyear?

    My writing, along with my attention span for writing, have gone downhill. I can't even make complete paragraphs anymore. Surely my diction is not so great that I can sum up everything I have to say with a few witty words. Oy. I think I'm just becoming a burnout. Can't I just go back to sleep?

    Friday, August 22
    Not So Sitcom

    It's very cliche for the younger sister to borrow clothes from her older sister on the night of her very first date with a guy. But what do you say to the little brother that asks to borrow his big sister's clothes?

    My brother's not a cross-dresser. I just happen to have a great collection of t-shirts.

    2 1/4 Kolachis Later....

    My car is up and running again. Things at work are always crazy, but such is the dental profession. One guy came in with a tooth completely broken off from its root. It was pretty cool to see how far in one can drill without hurting a patient. Quit being so squeamish you losers. Another patient was kinda enough to bring us homemade kolachis. Today is my day off and I had to run many errands and it is hot outside and now I am very stinky. The fee for renewing my plates went down $25 because I moved into a new district, and I picked up my books for school.
    Also purchased:
    - Rooney, Self-Titled
    - Coldplay, A Rush of Blood to the Head
    I watched Night of the Living Dead for the first time. I think it was pretty good for having been one of the first independent films ever made. Of course, the ending left me a little less than satisfied. I haven't seen the Slayden Crew for quite sometime, which is a tad depressing. And Kara is grounded from seeing me for awhile because her parents were not pleased with our misadventures. With the start of school approaching, I think I had better get off my ass and clean my room. More thoughts later....

    Go read other blogs. I'm sure they're more interesting.

    Wednesday, August 20
    Yikes! What a crazy day. I ran some errands over my lunch break today, and my car died. I was fortunate enough to get stalled as I was pulling back into my work's parking lot. One of the patients helped me push it 20 feet into a parking stall. It turns out it was the alternator, and my dad and brother were kind enough to come to my rescue. I'm thinking I will join AAA. I heard that the services they offer are definitely worth the $50 a year charge. And until I can learn to take care of myself (I can't even change a tire!), I need someone reliable to count on.
    To add to my distress, I mistakenly put one of Mina's dental instruments in the wrong machine, and it is possible that I broke it. I learned my lesson, but if it happens again, it's coming out of my paycheck.
    Seth has been job hunting and he got an interview for Friday. I'm positive they'll hire him. At least one of us has some good news for the day.

    Monday, August 18
    What do I do when I'm stressed out? I pluck my eyebrows.
    Why am I stressed out? Because I just found out that I'll only be making $7.50-$8.00 per hour this year. I mean, I like my job, but it's gotta be worth more money than that. When I told my dad, he gave me a look and a sigh of disappointment. I got my hopes up for a big paycheck because I have to help him pay for college. Now I feel like crap because I'm right back where I started. (Actually, less than that for the next month.)
    Why else do I feel like crap? The Mary Kay cult-recruiters tried to pressure me into making Mary Kay my full-time job. It costs $100 to start it up, and one lady even tried to convince me to write a bad check in hopes that it would not be cashed right away. I probably already gave them more information about myself than I should have. They entice you with promises of a glamourous lifestyle thanks to huge paychecks. Yeah that's great for a stay-at-home mom edging her way up to 30. But I'm only 18. I just started a new job. I'm about to start a 16-credit-hour school year. I don't have the time to put any effort into selling Mary Kay. I don't even like putting makeup on other people. Touching other people's faces is not my bag, baby.
    Gah, how can I escalate my mood? I feel like such a pile. :(

    Sunday, August 17
    Look Guys, I Wrote Another Poem

    Green Acres is the place to be.
    Gin and tonic is the drink for me.
    I'm a workaholic, that's no lie.
    Darlin' I love you, but that ain't an alibi.
    (Alternate line: Darlin' I love you, now pass me the Canada Dry.)

    Well I definitely overworked myself this week. I spent more of my day sleeping and lounging around watching tv than anything else. P.S. The Monkathon ruled. Thoughts of having to work tomorrow morning at 7am are not comforting. The summer is ending, and so are my days of fun. School, work and sleep are the main courses on my menu from now on.
    The Mary Kay lady called me. She wants me to be her model at some demo at the Marriott in Regency tomorrow night. I'll probably get some free gift for compensation, but it's another accomplishment to add to my brag list. (Note: I don't really have a brag list.) I dunno. Free makeover - it should be fun.
    Seth has been complaining about life in general lately. He says he's sick of living in LA. I'd do anything to get him to move here, even if I had to be his roommate to help him afford the cost of living. *grin* Things are pretty serious between us, but it's hardly convincing when he lives 1,300 miles away. I want more. I know he does, too.

    I'm totally not living up to my weekly ritual of watching the midnight movie at Dundee. Last night I went to see "Zelig," which looked like a good movie. However, I worked approximately 12 hours yesterday and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep in the theater. Then I crashed at a friend's house, came home at 8:30 in the morning, and slept here until 1pm. I'm such a loser. But I really needed to catch up on my sleep. I've been working both jobs this week, and I was definitely worn out. Last night I also went out to dinner with Colin because he is leaving for college on Wednesday. Not only did he want me to return a borrowed dvd, but he wanted to say goodbye to me as well. Ah, I feel loved. I was supposed to go to a barbeque at my cousin Kate's house because she is also leaving for college. But....that got cancelled. Major bummer.
    Life in general is weird. Last week Mina paid me $12.25 per hour, and this week she only paid me $7.00 per hour. I have no idea why, but I'm going to approach her tomorrow and ask her about it. Yesterday was my last day at Baker's, thank God. I had to train a new guy named Hilton. It was amusing because his friend Milton also works there. And just because they are both black, some customer had the notion to ask if they were twins. Yes their names rhyme, and yes they're both black, but they look nothing alike. I'll miss my friends at Baker's (especially the cute boys *grin*). Today is the last day of the Greek Festival downtown, but I think I am going to wait to go until next year. Besides, I don't really feel like going by myself. I think I'll just finish up some painting today.

    Saturday, August 16
    lisabee16: who is this
    Afganisrgay: akbar the afgani
    Afganisrgay: who dis
    lisabee16: lisa
    lisabee16: not an afgani
    Afganisrgay: oh ok
    Afganisrgay: to bad
    lisabee16: yeah sorry
    Afganisrgay: u hot
    Afganisrgay: i like this one fat chick named jullia
    lisabee16: oh yeah? did you ask her out?
    Afganisrgay: ya
    Afganisrgay: she dised me
    Afganisrgay: it was low
    lisabee16: i'm sorry
    Afganisrgay: ya
    Afganisrgay: pathetic hu?
    lisabee16: nah
    lisabee16: girls can be bitches
    Afganisrgay: oh
    Afganisrgay: u one
    lisabee16: mm not very often
    Afganisrgay: oh coo :)
    Afganisrgay: where u live
    lisabee16: nebraska
    Afganisrgay: oh
    lisabee16: you?
    Afganisrgay: dushville afganistan
    Afganisrgay: dusheville*
    lisabee16: doucheville?
    Afganisrgay: no
    Afganisrgay: dusheville
    lisabee16: hmm, I think it's doucheville
    Afganisrgay: maby
    Afganisrgay: its a gay name though
    lisabee16: yeah well, what are ya gonna do?
    Afganisrgay: get a guy and shoot him
    Afganisrgay: its the thing here
    lisabee16: yeah i guess you could do that
    Afganisrgay: its cool
    lisabee16: it would be sorta sad though
    Afganisrgay: ya
    Afganisrgay: you die if u dont do it
    lisabee16: i don't believe you
    Afganisrgay: its sad
    Afganisrgay: it makes you feel gulty
    lisabee16: and then you shoot yourself?
    Afganisrgay: aventuly
    lisabee16: eventually even
    Afganisrgay: yes
    Afganisrgay: lets see who can type 123 fastest
    lisabee16: 123
    lisabee16: i win
    lisabee16: fucker

    Thursday, August 14
    Long day at work. I work in the morning at Mina's and in the evening at Baker's. One of my customers turned out to be a Mary Kay lady, and she asked me to be a face model in her fall catalog. Um, what? Of all the people to ask, why me? This is one of the worst break-outs I've had in a long time. But I think it was just the lighting. In Baker's bathroom mirror, I look like shit. But in my mirror... Well let's just say.... Oh nevermind, we won't say that. :) But I tend to look great at home. Tomorrow I work 7am-1pm, and then 3pm-10:30pm. Oy, I'm so exhausted.

    Wednesday, August 13
    It will be a cold day in hell before I ever eat again....excluding this morning's breakfast. In the last week I have dined out more than I would in a month, and I am so fucking full. Mexican, Italian, American, Swedish, Thai, and Greek. I couldn't handle any more if I tried. I bought myself the drawing board from my birthday list. The shoes will probably come next, and maybe a haircut if Melanie ever comes back from Colorado. After a very busy week, my "vacation" is over. Now it's time to crack down, get to work, and get ready for school. I haven't even bought my books, and I still have to get repairs done on my car. Blah, and now I have to get ready for work. I mean, yay! I love my new job. :)

    Friday, August 8
    I went to Panera for the first time in a long time today. Their bagels and coffee are still as good as ever. I also went to the zoo for the first time in forever. I hadn't been there in at least over ten years. It was quite an adventure. I fell in love with the monkeys and marmosets and jellyfish and rainbow-colored parrots. The f*cking huge gorilla got pissed off at me for no reason and jumped right at the glass and pounded his chest at me. Needless to say, I was scared shitless. I took advantage of being 18 and stopped into Dr. John's for a lookaround. It was an okay place, but a little expensive for my tastes. I picked out a totally rad "Free Dr. John" t-shirt. After dinner at Fazoli's (mmmm), I concluded my evening with some lounging around and old school Saturday Night Live reruns. This week I've been home only to sleep, and even then, I am still crashing at other's people's places every few days. I dunno. It's nice to get out of the house and do my own thing. I guess I need to get it out of my system before school starts.

    Wednesday, August 6

    All is wonderful in the life of Lisa. However, I'm taking the week off.

    Monday, August 4
    Happy Birthday to you! There will be a delay with your present due to fiscal conflicts; however, the wait will be worth it....I hope.

    I painted my nails neon green.
    I wore three different outfits.
    I drank four cups of coffee.
    I pulled out an eyelash and made a wish upon it.
    I wore lipstick.
    I smelled like "Desire."

    All for you.

    Sunday, August 3
    Today I told Brian G. that I was happy. And I was sincere.

    Siv001: sounds like its going pretty well, hehe ;-)
    lisabee16: yes for the most part
    lisabee16: I am happy.
    Siv001: well thats all that matters :P

    A Royal Satire

    The Baron was one of the most powerful lords in Westphalia, for his castle had not only a gate, but windows. His great hall, even, was hung with tapestry. All the dogs of his farmyards formed a pack of hounds at need; his grooms were his huntsmen; and the curate of the village was his grand almoner. They called him "My Lord," and laughed at all his stories.
    The Baron's lady weighed about three hundred and fifty pounds, and was therefore a person of great consideration, and she did the honours of the house with a dignity that commanded still greater respect. Her daughter Cunegonde was seventeen years of age, fresh-coloured, comely, plump, and desirable. The Baron's son seemed to be in every respect worthy of his father. The Preceptor Pangloss was the oracle of the family, and little Candide heard his lessons with all the good faith of his age and character.
    Pangloss was professor of metaphysico-theologico-cosmolo-nigology. He proved admirably that there is no effect without a cause, and that, in this best of all possible worlds, the Baron's castle was the most magnificent of castles, and his lady the best of all possible Baronesses.
    "It is demonstrable," said he, "that all things cannot be otherwise than as they are; for all being created for an end, all is necessarily for the best end. Observe, that the nose has been formed to bear spectacles -- thus we have spectacles. Legs are visibly designed for stockings -- and we have stockings. Stones were made to be hewn, and to construct castles -- therefore my lord has a magnificent castle; for the greatest baron in the province ought to be the best lodged. Pigs were made to be eaten -- therefore we eat pork all the year round. Consequently they who assert that all is well have said a foolish thing, they should have said all is for the best."

    ~ Voltaire, Candide

    My only birthday present. Thank you. I love it.

    || S O || W H A T || N O W ? ||

    I just graduated from high school. So now what do I do? Despite how much I longed to grow up in the past, I'm not so sure I'm ready for it now. I guess I'm just throwing it all to the wind...or rather, peeing into the wind.

    WARNING: This blog is not slow-computer friendly!

    || B I O ||

    Name: Lisa
    Age: Varies
    Location: Omaha, Nebraska, USA
    Loves: Music, books, coffeehouses, journals, downtown, the ocean, traveling, meeting new people, art, Easy Mac, Trading Spaces, figuring things out for myself, toothpaste
    Loathes: Traffic jams, loose change, typos, death, heartbreak, bug bites, chick flicks, mocha, long nails, too much lip gloss, cancellations, pressure, greasy hair

    || C U R R E N T ||

    Otis Redding, Marvin Gaye, Snoop Dogg, Tool, Blue October

    Mood:The current mood of at


    [Love Park, Philadelphia]

    || E Y E || C A N D Y ||

    || W O R D S || W O R D S || W O R D S ||

    Midnight Movie Menu:
    7/12-13 Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
    7/18-19 Raiders of the Lost Ark
    7/25-26 The Breakfast Club
    8/1-2 Spinal Tap
    8/9-10 TRON
    8/15-16 Zelig
    8/22-23 Spirited Away
    8/29-30 Escape From New York
    9/5-6 Karate Kid
    9/12-13 The Muppets Take Manhattan
    9/19-20 Young Frankenstein
    9/26-27 Amelie
    10/3-4 Better Off Dead
    10/11-12 Repulsion
    10/17-18 Office Space
    10/24-25 SE7EN
    10/31-11/1 Evil Dead
    11/7-8 The Graduate
    11/14-15 The Big Lebowski
    11/21-22 The Hudsucker Proxy
    11/28-29 Predator
    12/5-6 Little Shop of Horrors
    12/12-13 High Fidelity
    Where: Dundee Theater, 50th and Dodge
    When: Midnight
    Cost: $5
    Be there or be a boring loser.

    || L I N K A G E ||

    C'est Moi
    Phresh Phish
    My Photos
    Creative Writing

    Egyptian Hymns
    International Experiences
    Oedipus Rex
    The Odyssey

    Rock My World
    Something Positive
    SLAM Omaha
    Toothpaste For Dinner

    || M O R T A L S ||







    Jon Stalker

    Goose Named Dan




    Dave Barry

    Corrupt Drew

    Alison Wonderland

    Anna Bear


    Lisa the Roadie

    Meg Dreamer




    || R E W I N D ||

    April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December

    January, February, March, April, May, June, July

    || S T A L K E R ||

    AIM: lisabee16
    Yahoo!: lisabee729

    || M I S C ||

    Click for a random deep thought.

    Lisa/Female/16-20. Lives in United States/Nebraska/Omaha/Pacific Hollow, speaks English. And likes Writing.
    This is my blogchalk:
    United States, Nebraska, Omaha, English, Lisa, Female, 16-20

    || R E F E R R E R S ||

    || A T T R I B U T I O N ||

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